hadriel | Chapter ~6~ [Video]

Hello, everyone.

[Delmar's smiling, though its a bit distant. He's lost in thought mostly, mind wandering elsewhere, somewhere among old New York tenement houses and the chilly winter waters along Rockaway.]

I just realized that, um, that with how long I've been here, I'm probably 64 by now. Isn't that strange? Or...or maybe that isn't so strange...maybe I should have thought of that sooner.....

[His voice trails off, a little embarrassed, but after a moment he clears his throat and starts again]

It just made me think about how many of us miss birthdays and all those special occasions from back home because we're here. So I just wanted to wish everyone who has missed their birthdays too a belated happy birthday and to say that...that once Hope is recovered and the bakery has more ingredients, I'll make a birthday cake every day so that at least there will be something to make it a little special...

[He's not had a birthday party since he was a small child but he had always hoped to throw them for a special someone or for nieces and nephews. Delmar had had visions of little cone hats and baking cakes some someone could blow out the candles. Life hadn't gone that way, but at least maybe here it could, if only in a small way]

And, um, well that's all I wanted to say. Have a good day, everyone.

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Why would she criticize a party? If her family went to all the effort to celebrate with her?

[He is flabbergasted by the idea.]

Well, Margaery, you see...oh I really don't know where to start...

[Delmar draws his lower lip between his teeth]

It made me think a lot about my family. I've not spoken to them in a long time.

That was how she enjoyed herself. Critiquing the work of others. She was called the Queen of Thorns on account of her sharp tongue. Fortunately for me, I learned my lessons well and rarely was on the receiving end of one of her barbs.

[Delmar needs to meet Olenna Tyrell, then he'll understand]

I understand. These things can be difficult.

[she watches him sympathetically]

Truly? May I. . . ask why not?

I can't even imagine what she could possibly have to criticize about you, Miss Margaery.

[After all, Margaery had always shown him kindness, patience, and grace.]

Oh... [Delmar is unsure where to start. The matter of his family is a complicated one, and at times feels like stepping lightly on icy sidewalks to be certain you don't slip. Made more complicated by the fact that, despite all the hurts, Delmar still wishes not to speak ill of them.]

...well...my parents passed away a long time ago... and my brother and sister....they don't, um, they'd rather I not visit.

Oh, you'd be amazed. I had to learn the histories behind all of the Great Houses and which houses had eligible sons of the appropriate age, I had to learn how to keep a charming façade even when I was enraged or unhappy, I had to learn how to run a household, how to sew and sing and dance prettily, and how to mold myself into the sort of woman a particular man would want. It was all very complicated.

[but she was trained to be a honeypot since childhood. ironically, it's easier to be genuinely kind here now that she no longer has to worry about the appearance of kindness.

she waits patiently, afraid that perhaps she's reopened an old wound]

I'm so sorry to hear about your parents. But why wouldn't your brother and sister want you to visit? You're kind, you're caring, who wouldn't want to be with you?

I'd much rather you tell us if you are ever unhappy than pretend. Pretending will hurt you much more.

[He knows. In a different way, sure, but he knows. Just like he knows somewhere inside why exactly his brother and sister don't want to see him, even though he wishes he didn't.]

Thank you. That's very sweet of you. I'm afraid I'm not the type of person they'd like in their lives They...they think it would confuse their children or give them bad ideas.... you know...because of how I am.

I know it does, but [she bites her lower lip] it's a difficult habit to let go of. Truthfully, I still feel the pain of losing Matt, but I know there's nothing I can do about it.

[she's had a feeling that he wasn't always as happy as he appeared, but wasn't sure how to approach it. in a way, she's glad that he made this post, as it let her address how she was worried about him.

she blinks in confusion. she knows exactly what he's talking about, but had assumed the Earth was more tolerant than Westeros] ...because you prefer men? But that's--that's ridiculous. It's nothing to be ashamed of and nothing to cut off family over. My brother felt the same way and we all accepted him. To be honest, I'm attracted to both men and women and they accepted me, too. The Faith of the Seven is another matter, but this is family.

[Delmar's expression turns to a soft but bittersweet smile]

That is ok. It means you loved him so very much. It's a beautiful thing, even if it hurts.

[Love is no anesthetic, it is something alive with its own joys and pains.]

I..I don't blame them, Miss Margaery. Its different back home, the neighbors would talk...I don't want to put them through all that.

[He knows how hurtful it can be, bearing the scorn of the community, he doesn't want his family to have to go through that too]

I do miss him very much. Every day, I wake up missing him. And I channel the hurt into my determination to make the gods send me to his world when it's my time.

[and it doesn't cease once the one who's loved is no longer there]

Why would the neighbors talk? What business is it of theirs? It's kind of you to want to spare your family, but at the same time you're family. That's far more important than what the neighbors might think.

[she knows that people can be dreadfully prejudiced. just look at what the Faith of the Seven did to her brother. but she feels that family should accept their family members as they are]

You will get there, Miss Margaery. I am sure of that. Don't you worry.

[It would simply be wrong of the Gods not to]

Oh...well...they... they like to be sure their kids won't go to near to my house or...something like that. Where I am from or at least when I am from [as his talks with Michael and Harlan have shown him maybe it is more of a matter of time than place] its...its very wrong to be someone like me. And it scares a lot of people.

[she gives him a slightly wavering smile] You'll have to be confident enough for the both of us.

[she doesn't believe that the so-called gods care about them at all, other than just plain not dying]

It's not like it's catching, like a cold. Either their attractions will lean that way or they won't. There's no way of preventing it. [her conversations with Matt led her to believe that in NYC of 2016, being gay was not remarkable in and of itself] I'm sorry that you've been treated so cruelly in your time. You'll just have to find a better time and go there instead. You could come with me?

Of course I'd love to go with you, Miss Margaery...

[But his voice falters]

...but...but what if they needed me? They might one day...

[They haven't yet.]

Then, do! I'm told that men can marry other men in Matt's world, it's not too late for you to find a special someone and fall in love.

[she tries to sound reassuring]

They'll have each other to turn to. They'll be fine.

[Margaery values family, but doesn't see how they could just turn their backs on Delmar]

Chapter ~6~ [Video]

[Private Video from here]

[Private Video]

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