hadriel | voice;

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voice;

[ Will hasn't really been around much at all. Finding small comfort in escapism. Fishing was too obvious a choice as was the spot down by the river he'd made for his Fenic fox and Nugs. No, Will had been living low, hiding out in various God's temples and small nooks and crannies not so deep inside the tunnels, practicing how to most efficiently take out some of the monsters with or without a weapon.

His voice is raspy like he hasn't spoken a word in weeks... which is partly true. ]

My mind has been a busy mess of blur and motion. Thoughts buzzing past like worker bees, endlessly in their endeavor... Nauseating- I er, I know a lot of turbulent occurrences have swooped down and splattered, most ungracefully so, all over this shithole of a cavern we have no choice but to call home. It's been testing, to say the least...

[ A moment of silence as Will recalled the fires, the mirrors and so on. That wasn't what he wanted to be focusing on right now. A heavy sigh before he continues. ]

... Such has been out of our control, true, but what about the things that aren't? There's no death here, no justice either, no real justice. Sure, we have the illusion our City Guard like to cast over us, that we're safe and looked after. Frankly, since Jill vanished I can't for certain say I'd trust any of them with my life- Ah, but what does life matter here, huh? No death, no crime. Murderers and monsters are our neighbors. Friendly Mr. Rodgers in his bloodstained sweater...

[ He's rambling, emotional and tired. ]

We need justice. We're ruled by our emotions, literally! God's? What God's?' He reveals the deep things of darkness and brings utter darkness into the light.' Isn't that what a God does? No, all this death, killing, darkness has to stop. We need a system of order, a place to hold the dangerous, a means of judging and sentencing them... How many times can we be revived before it's too late?

... Well, I'm gonna be trying to do something about it, even if I have to do it alone.

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[ Such a simple thing to say, yet it held more meaning than any other human could ever understand. Will listened closely, nodding as Hannibal spoke of the family they shared here. It was close, different but close to what his dear friend had wanted back home. less blood had been spilled to get it. ]

I won't rest until I have justice, Hannibal. It was my job to know, to understand and see... I can't settle knowing I was killed for no reason. I have no crime scene to investigate, no evidence to look over, not even a list of real suspects.

[ He spoke of himself but Will wished to bring justice to the deaths of others here too. Sure, their little family was just coming together but Will couldn't shake the last drop of goodness and honestness out of his system. He needed this. ]

[Very briefly, Hannibal considered his options. He could construct evidence, guide Will in "discovery" that his murderer was someone who had long since vanished. But had they not just sworn their alleigence to one another? And did he not slit his friend's throat to transform him? And in the manner that he had been transformed by that night in Baltimore? Allowing his uncertainty to continue was more harm than good, and truth would build trust.

He took a breath.]

It was I, Will.

[ There was indeed trust. More trust than before. Had Will not recalled their time together here, before his few years away from the cave, he might have felt differently.

However, the confession was not what he had been expecting. As the words slipped into his ears, like a silk tie through its own knot, Will swallowed. A twitch of his brow, a furrowing, and knotting of another kind. Confusion, disbelief for a brief momnet and then something akin to pain... Heartbreak.

Turning slowly to face Hannibal. His eyes took their time on their way to Hannibals, taking in the expression, or lack of, on his dear friends face. There was nothing to gain from lying to him. Hannibal was... Was telling the truth? ]

You?... I.. I er, I don't understand...

[Hannibal's expression was gentle, kind. There was no shame, no fear, no sorrow. And no hint of deception. He so rarely lied directly, and he clearly was not lying now.]

I believe you do understand, Will. Especially now. Especially with what you remember, with what you and I shared in the time between what you remembered the first time you were here, and what you remember now.

[ Shock. Will was in shock at what was being confessed. Of course, their relationship was that of push and shove, cat and mouse, yet he never expected Hannibal to actually take his life, not here and not like that at least! ]

I was... You just... I can't...

[ A tremble rushed over Will. Raising his hands as they shook and rubbing at his own face. Exhaling deeply in judders and shudders. Replaying the moment of his death over and over, letting it reflect in the mirrors of his mind. ]

But it... It doesn't make sense, Hannibal! You just...

[ Touching his throat, where the blade had ripped it open like a zipper, before biting down on the side of his index finger. Gathering his thoughts before he spoke again. When he did, he looked to Hannibal with a hint of tears in his eyes. He was hurting, emotional as he still couldn't quite come to an understanding. ]

... It was meaningless. A meaningless risk... I may not have returned!... You'd risk that? For what?

[And there, there was a hint of regret. Not because of Will's distress, not really, but because of the fact that Will had almost not returned. It was a move that almost went wrong, and that was painful in its own way, but he also almost lost his dear friend.]

It was not meaningless. I needed you to understand, Will. To see. it was a foundation upon which I would have built, had you not then left, only to return as you are now. But...you are correct, that it was a risk, one I took then, but might not take now. I was fairly certain you would return. But you almost didn't. That was...difficult.

Oh, oh that was difficult for you, was it Hannibal? Shall I tell you what's difficult huh!? Dying! Dying is difficult!

[ Snapping out in anger and pain. Though, what he was more angry about was how simple the act had been. No elaborate setup, no torture, and torment, no harvesting his remains or making him into something beautiful to behold. Was it wrong that he was upset about something so sick and twisted as that? That he was hurting because Hannibal did nothing with his body? ]

... Is that why you waited for me at the temple... Guilt? Guilt that I'd not return and you'd permanently severed a part of yourself?

[ Not thinking about the impact of what he was saying, Will continued. Calming as he spoke, yet still, physically a bit taken back as his hands continued their trembling and his eyes still glittering with possible tears. ]

What did you... What did you do with me? Did you, eat me?

I waited for you at the temple from the very beginning, Will.

[He did not do it out of guilt, but because he wanted to be with his friend, wanted to be there with him through the whole process. It was, in fact, a vital part of what he wished to do.]

I could not keep your entire body, Will. There had to be a murder scene, and it was important you not be aware from the start that I had been the one. But I did consume a part of you. We both did.

To see me reborn...

[ He stated under his breath, his eyes falling to glance upon the floor. It was the next part, the confession, and clarification that stopped Will from talking, from breathing for a few moments.

Something began to bloom in the pit of his stomach, like a mass of moths all trying to burst out, up and through his mouth all at the same time. Will swallowed, his eyes darting around as his mind tried to distract him, tried to keep him from the truth. His body, on the other hand, his body told him everything he needed to know.

A sensation, a tingling in his chest. No pain, but an almost anxious and nervousness lay heavy under his ribs. Jaw moving from side to side as it often did when Will struggled with his words, his thoughts. Closing his eyes, Will exhaled a shaking breath, like he'd just jumped into freezing cold water. The expressions that washed over his face were various different ones, yet the one thing clear in all of them was that he understood.

A tear rolled down his cheek as he finally found his voice. An emptiness tried to push its way inside his chest, in memory and yet Will felt some kind of sick satisfaction he would have to address later. ]

...My heart?

[He understood.

It would have taken time, for the Will that was to push through the darkness Hannibal had spun around him like a cocoon, time for him to come to these realizations, to be able to accept the darkness and, paradoxically, find the light, the beauty. But this Will was different. This Will had already walked through that dark valley and emerged on the other side, his imago. He could see the beauty that Hannibal wished for him.

The older man nodded at Will's realization. He tilted his head as that tear coursed down Will's cheek, and lifted a hand to tenderly brush it away.]

Yes, Will.

[ Feeling the tender brush of Hannibal's fingers across his check, Will closed his eyes once more. Raising his own hand, to cup the one that dried his tears, and gently pulling it down into view. Will looked closely, scrutinizingly so, at each line and groove that had creased its way deep into the skin. Hannibal's hands looked kind to Will, caring and delicate, they were not the hands you'd expect of a murderer.

As his inspection of his dear friend's hand came to an end, Will took the back of it in his own palm, cupping it almost. Slowly he closed his fingers around and behind Hannibal's until they almost resembled something that looked like a heart. Hannibal's thumb the Superia Vena Cava, Will's three fingers behind it made the tips of the Aorta, Hannibal's own fingers as the pulmonary artery and vein, leaving their cupped palms as the right and left ventricle.

Perhaps it was Will's vast imagination that allowed him to see them this way, but maybe Hannibal saw it too? Either way, the symbolism of it all pounded like a pulse in Will's chest. ]

I had to see you, to know you... You had to know me, to make me see... And now we share the same heart.

[Hannibal saw it, that heart made of flesh, only their own flesh and not that of Hannibal's victim. Will had examined Hannibal's hand, seen in it all that Hannibal was, and folded it within his own hands, his own power and agency. Accepted him and joined with him. The symbolism was beautiful.]

My heart has been yours for a long time, Will.

[ Will began to pant. The shock of what he had just discovered, what had been confessed and remembered was all too much. Despite being aware enough to mold their hands together, to make the connection as morbidly beautiful as it was, the small, innocent part of Will was screaming out inside of him, not being able to process the idea that they had both consumed Will's, physical heart.

As his panting became labored, Will pressed closer against Hannibal, trapping their heart between their chests. His free hand reached up and took his dear friend by the back of the neck. Will was overwhelmed with emotions and lingering pain from their previous encounter. ]

I can't- ... I can't remember what it feels like to not have you in mine, Hannibal.

[ A laugh on a breath, and Will pressed his lips against Hannibal's, squeezing tight with that hand around the back of his neck. He wanted it to hurt as well as be enjoyable, it seemed only fair all things considered. ]

Edited 2017-10-08 03:56 (UTC)

[Ah, the pain was exquisite, particularly considering where that initial soreness came from, Hannibal's declaration of love in the form of a very long fall. Hannibal answered it by sliding his free hand into Will's hair, making a fist in those curls and then twisting. He kissed Will back fiercely, his lips parting, his teeth nipping Will's lower lip.]

[ Feeling his lip trapped between Hannibal's teeth as they kissed, Will twisted and tilted his head until their lips were apart. Blood from the fresh tear trickled down his chin and Will licked it off slowly with his tongue before swallowing it. ]

What happens now? Where do we go from here, Hannibal?

[ Watching his dear friend's lips as he spoke, noticing a smear of his own blood against them, no longer having to wonder what he tastes like... They'd already partaken in Will's flesh as unsettling as that should feel... It didn't. ]

[Hannibal licked his lips as well, tasting his friend's blood, a taste he would always remember intimately, as he remembered the smell of his friend, the sight of him, the sound of his voice. Will was deep inside him, pumping through his veins.]

What do you want, Will? Where do you desire to go?

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