hadriel | 009 [Video]

[After a month or so of mostly sticking to text and voice, Lance is back to video for another network broadcast. He's still looking a little unwell, but definitely better than in his last post or any time he's spoken with someone in person since then.

He was also fortunate enough to be in his apartment when the dust storm started, so he doesn't have to camp out in some public place or with people he doesn't like. Hurray! And since pretty much everyone is stuck inside somewhere, this actually ends up being a good time to make a network post to address a few things.]

Hello, everyone. For those who just arrived or otherwise haven't met me yet, I'm Dr. Lance Sweets, and I'm a psychologist; if anyone ever needs or wants to speak to someone professionally, whether about being here or otherwise, you're welcome to send a message or call at any time.

[And that usual note out of the way--]

But I also wanted to discuss something somewhat unrelated, which is the subject of creating an organized directory of who has what skills that they're willing to teach, if asked. Many here want to learn new skills or hobbies, whether due to practicality or boredom or otherwise, but it can be difficult to figure out who to ask especially if you're new and may not want to either use the network for a general announcement, or approach someone you may not know individually.

So a list of who is willing to teach what skills, and who is alright with being asked to do so, would be beneficial a lot of people here. I can compile and maintain it as a file that can be shared.

[It's not like he's doing a whole lot at the moment, having pretty much quit working at the Clinic. He seems to briefly consider continuing with another topic but then ends the feed there; the other thing he wanted to discuss probably wouldn't go over as well as the first one, and he'd prefer everyone not get distracted.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[This is not new territory for Will. The amount of which you were mirroring Nico's sulking was stunning, Lance. The big difference, besides the issues here which Will only could guess at, was that Lance was an adult and not fourteen going on ninety-eight.]

It may not make difference to your patients where you meet them but it makes a difference to everyone who used to work with you and cares about you. And I bet it makes a difference to you.

You're separating yourself from others. People don't do that unless they're in pain or trying to hide something. You're not antisocial by nature, Dr. Sweets.

Don't you know you can't take care of others unless you take care of yourself? You are not doing your patients any favors.

[This demigod is not going to leave you alone. Since it started or got worse around the same time the Null attacked, Will didn't have to make a huge leap. He'd been through two wars, he'd seen demigods wake up screaming, cut themselves off from their brothers and sisters. Wars did things to people, demigods weren't an exception. And neither were you Sweets. It just wasn't something he could fix.]

Edited (full sentences like woah) 2018-01-16 20:21 (UTC)

[There are several reasons why Lance doesn't want to meet with patients at the new Clinic location; it's true that he would've preferred to still do things as he had been before the Null attack, but that isn't possible he's accepted that. So at this point meeting people elsewhere is better for him, but he can't really explain that because he doubts his reasoning would be considered valid.

He's pretty sure his coworkers don't care about his absence as much as Will thinks they do, though. No one else has called him on it yet, after all.

But the rest of what Will says is more difficult to argue with, even if he's going to try.]

I understand my limitations. I'm only doing counseling when I can devote the necessary attention to it.

[Which is true, for the most part. He can usually muster up enough energy and focus for a short session, so it hasn't been too difficult to manage, but he also can't really bring himself to turn someone down; he's the only psychologist available, and until it's a situation where his own problems actively interfere with his ability to counsel someone he's not going to refuse to help.]

It's... True, that I have been avoiding people purposefully, but there's no point in upsetting and worrying someone by talking to them about it when I already know what I'm supposed to be doing. It just takes time.

[And okay, sure, he knows that's not exactly how it works; the talking part itself is just as important as the end result of knowing what's causing the issues, and how to deal with them. But because he does know the latter two parts, he doesn't want to do the talking; everything is so complicated, it involves personal issues he doesn't want to share and situations involving other people that he shouldn't share, and it's all just terrifying to even think about trying to discuss.]

[Lance. Why did you have to try and make everything so difficult for yourself?}

It's good your still seeing patients, it helps to keep a routine. Just make sure that when you're helping them you're actually helping them and it's not hurting you. Understanding your own limitations is one thing, accepting them is another. If you're not helping yourself you're not helping your patients. They're depending on you to be 100%. You're not.

[Know thyself, Lance Sweets. If you're barely mustering up energy to see patients, your not helping them. Or yourself.]

There's a reason why doctors aren't supposed to treat themselves. Objectivity.

I don't know who you are close too, but you need to talk to someone. Not yourself. And don't try to tell me you're the only psychotherapist here. Sometimes, a friend will do in a pinch. And we're all in pinches here. Besides, that's what friends are for. Don't worry about upsetting them.

Did you know demigods almost always do quests in threes? Do you know why? Because it's dangerous to go alone, and I don't just mean physically.

[Because that's what he does okay; he's good at it. And ugh, he doesn't really appreciate that Will hits upon another issue, somehow, in that even if Lance is able to devote enough attention and concentration to help someone in a counseling, more and more often recently it's been really bad for him mentally. But his own issues feels like a selfish reason not to take patients, and so Will putting it this way helps alleviate some of that and give him a different way to think about it.

Whether or not he'll act on it is another thing, but still. He's quiet while Will talks, gaze shifted off to the side, but he's definitely listening and thinking about what he's saying; when he finishes Lance doesn't respond immediately, deciding how to do so. He doesn't want to say too little and seem dismissive--he's not trying to be--but this entire conversation is much more personal and honest than he usually participates in.]

I have a friend I can talk to. Maybe after the storm is over.

[That's as much of a promise as he's willing to make; he won't say he'll do it for sure, but he'll consider it.]

[That's the thing about Will. He's a lot like sunshine. Sometimes he's lazy and sunny and laid back, fun to be around, and others? Other times he shines down on you like a ton of bricks and won't leave you alone until you pass out from exhaustion.]

Good. I'll come by and check on you a few days after the storms over. See how you're doing.

[and to make sure you were actually following through. And weren't mentally and physically stable. Because he liked you Lance Sweets.]

Let me know if you do need anything I can help with in the meantime, alright?

[Part of it is that, and part of it is something much more subtle; Lance is more willing to trust Will's motives because of his age and experiences than he is to trust many of the adults here despite being an adult himself. Kids are much less likely to be bothering with this sort of thing unless they truly care; they tend to keep their manipulations more to simple things among peers, not worrying about the wellbeing of adults. So Lance believes there no ulterior motive here, whether conscious or subconscious, and it makes it easier for him to trust the advice and concern that he's getting.

Still, he would normally argue that he doesn't need to be checked up on, but this time he decides not to bother. He doesn't really have the energy for it and it's not like he expects Will to listen anyway, which at this point he shouldn't; Lance knows full well that at this point, if their positions were reversed, Lance would consider supervision necessary.

So he just lets out a long sigh, letting some more of the act drop, and just nods.]

Alright. Just give me a warning before you come over.

[He's not big on people just showing up at his door, for various reasons. And there's a short pause, before he adds--]

And... Thank you.

[For caring, even though Lance feels a distinct sense of guilt at worrying a teenager who has plenty of other things to be concerned about.]

[Good call Lance. Will wouldn't listen to you if you protested. He'd show up at your door anyway, so he's quite glad that you're choosing to cooperate. You're too important, everyone here is, and he's not about to let this place or anything else get in the way. You were there for people, and now it's your turn.]

Don't worry, I will.

[Gods weren't really big on surprises either, so Will totally got Lance's apprehension. But at least with Lance he wasn't likely to roast him or turn him into a sunflower or something. He'd just be upset.]

And your welcome.

[Will did have plenty to worry about. Some of those worries he couldn't help though, he couldn't fix. This was something he could.]

I'll see you in a few days.

[Agreeing to at least give him a heads up is a sign of respect that Lance appreciates, and although he's already apprehensive about this visit in the future, at least it could be worse.]

I'll see you then.

[He gives a small nod, both in agreement and farewell, before disconnecting.]

009 [Video]

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