EIGHTH SONG ♫ VIDEO (backdated to before the deserted event!)

[hasitsthorns]

[ It's inky black when the video starts rolling. The camera adjusts to the low light and focuses on Rose. It's still hard to make her out in the dark but she sits with legs crossed and guitar in hand. It's been a while. Normally, she only addresses the network when she's got something ridiculous to share with her fellow Hadrielites but today's clearly more of a somber affair.

There's the quiet count of 1, 2, 3... and a song starts to carry on the night air. She sings in time with the tune, a melancholy lilt to her voice. ]

I found God in a catalytic converter in Topeka on a Monday night. I taste blood every time I think of summer. If that's true, I'm in for quite a treat, 'cause I'm beggin' for the sun in a mid-Missouri winter waitin' desperately to get outta' town. No, you can't keep a good man down. You've been known to obsess over the future. Do you think you'll get away from the past? As you stone yourself just to make it through 'til midnight consider what you might have found; you think you've got a good thing now.

I found God in a catalytic converter in Topeka on a Monday night. Every saint has a past, every sinner has a future so you know what keeps me hangin' around. No, you can't keep a good man down. From here on, you can count on all things going the way they must've from the start. All you feel, all you feel, all you feel is the current flowing through you and seizing your infected heart-

[ There's a pause. A hitch of breath, a mistake and jumbled sound of the wrong strings. Almost immediately after, she laughs. ]

Ah, jeez. Lame. I said I wasn't gonna' cry. [ The blond clears her throat, gives a shaky breath. ]

It's been two years, give or take, since I arrived here. I'm the only one left of the Havenites. It's kind of... wild to think about sometimes. I had a lot I wanted to say, actually. A lot I felt. [ She lapses into silence again briefly. ]

I thought maybe I'd just sing instead. That seemed fitting. Despite everything, there's still... some parts of the me that came before all this. I know I've changed. Not in just bad ways, of course, but. Kind of makes you wonder, you know? A lot of what could have been, what might have been... For me, this is all there is anymore and some days I'm not sure how to feel about that.

Anyway. I just wanted to say Happy Two Year Hadriel Anniversary to me, I guess. It's been a pretty alright ride, all things considered. Here's to hoping I make it another year and however many more to come.

[ Her hand reaches out, blocking the lens and ending the feed. ]

Comments

[sciencelizard]

[Alphys blinks at her for a moment, her hand still on her chest.]

I... well... y-you know you could come with me, too.

[It's a little honest, even for her, and she ducks her head to obscure the red on her face.]

I know monsters aren't exactly your, uhm, family, but I bet everyone would really love you. And monsters take care of each other, so... I mean. Just. So you know.

dear god I am sorry in advance

[hasitsthorns]

[ Oh, that's-

For a moment, the woman feels like she's suspended in time. She remembers what she'd thought any number of ways in Haven when travel to other worlds was discussed as a possibility. For all the dreams she'd have of traversing the multiverse and seeing her friends world's, of belonging somewhere with them- It had never been more than a pipe dream. She never entertained the notion for long.

I won't ask, she'd thought, to squash the desire down. She couldn't curse another world with the blight that was herself; she had decided in that Hellish place that she was black stain upon any reality she was thrust upon. It had happened back home, it had happened in Haven, it had happened in Hadriel. She was a monster that ruined everything she touched and nothing good would ever come of her presence. At least here, that didn't mean she was outcast. Negative emotions could still be used, after all. She was good for something for once in her life.

I won't ask, she'd thought, and somehow had never considered the possibility that anyone would want her. ] You'd.

I mean, like. I'm not- [ Her voice sounds impossibly small, unsure in an uncharacteristic way. ] I don't.

[ Don't cry, she chides mentally. That's not going to help your case any. But someone... Someone wants her. Despite everything, Alphys sees a place for Rose in her world that Rose herself hadn't let dream could be a possibility. ] I mean, I'd like that I just-

Are you sure?

[ For as much as she's expecting the other woman to change her mind, there's some small part of her that still hopes: Please say that you're sure. ]

NO THIS IS GOOD

[sciencelizard]

[She knows in a moment that she's said something very, very significant. Not that she doesn't know Rosie has some hangups about what is home, and who is home, but-- she's suddenly worried that she may be getting Rosie's hopes up for nothing. But one thing is always clear.]

I-- o-of course.

[There's only so long she can go without adding the all-important caveat, of course.]

I mean, I, as long as I can go home I mean, I'm not sure if I can go back due to some uh, circumstances and stuff, but that's a me thing and I mean even if I couldn't you deserve to because everyone there is very nice and I'm sure you could... find... yeah.

[That's the best amount of words she can pull right now.]

[hasitsthorns]

[ Of course, she says, and even if it ends up being impossible... Well, the fact that Alphys wants her there is good enough for Rose. It truly is the thought that counts in this case. She knows that if it isn't something that can happen it's not in their control but the fact that she was wanted is. ]

I don't think I'd want to go if you couldn't be there, honestly, but- I appreciate it. The sentiment.

Maybe things will work out, somehow, that everyone can kind of. Go where they want. Or even come and go? That'd be nice.

[sciencelizard]

[She manages to smile, clasping her hands together on the other side of the screen.]

Well, uhm... I think wherever we end up, I'd just be happy to be there with you.

[It can be a little embarrassing to be that blatant, but-- it's true. If she can't go home... well, her new friends are just as good. Maybe this is what it means to be the heroine.]

So, uhm, I hope we aren't just l-locked out. Or anything.

[hasitsthorns]

[ She manages to smile too, something sweet and sincere. ]

I think I would be too, honestly. So let's hope for that, yeah? That wherever we end up, it'll be together.

[sciencelizard]

[Alphys nods.]

Yeah. I think we can make that happen, right? Or I mean. I believe we can.