Video || 01

[theweakhavepurpose]

[Pratt is sitting on the lower bunk of his tiny-house, part of his machine gun visible to the side and a wood plank wall behind him. He's wearing his deputy outfit again, his hair in neat braids thanks to Kettara.]

Before this whole talk of moving I was starting to set up a target range because I'm getting rusty. Figured since we have a lot of people who are experienced with firearms, arrows, knives, whatever, that I'd set it up so anyone can use it.

I've made a few spinner targets and I found a few wooden target dummies near the Colosseum but they're in rough shape so they need some clean up. I was working on a skeet shooter, but my plan to use a motor from a moped didn't work since they're electric and full of pointless plastic crap instead of useful gearbelts.

[He shakes his head, frowning at broadcasting his failure to everyone. He hadn't meant to say that.]

That's not the point.

Since we're apparently being shuffled to the next livestock pasture for us, I'm going to hold off setting it up until we're there.

What else would you guys like? Anyone need something to stand up to a crossbow? Or more intricate for throwing stars? And this shouldn't be a problem here, but I'm preemptively letting you know that there's no flamethrowers allowed at my range.

[He narrows his eyes at the screen before shutting off the feed. He definitely looks like he's adding that caveat because he's encountered that problem before.]

Comments

[itsnotaonesie]

[too late!]

Yeah, good point. I don't have any skirts layin' around anyway. Man, that planet sounds kind of horrible.

[theweakhavepurpose]

You know that's where we'll end up, because it's the shittiest option. We'll all be wearing thirty shirts and looking like the staypuft marshmallow man.

[itsnotaonesie]

They both sound kind of awful. I can't decide if freezing sounds worse than dealing with jungle bugs and stuff or not.

[theweakhavepurpose]

What if it's like Starship Troopers and they're huge bugs full of goo?

Maybe we could ride them!

[itsnotaonesie]

Dude, no. The bugs in Starship Troopers traveled in like swarms and chopped people's head's off. I don't wanna fight or ride something like that!

[theweakhavepurpose]

Don't tell me we wouldn't look badass on an army of bugs.

[But would they? Would they really?]

I guess we'll see when we get.. wherever.

[itsnotaonesie]

I mean, we probably would, but I think they would just eat us.

Now I'm kind of worried about giant bugs, though? So maybe I actually will build a flamethrower.

[theweakhavepurpose]

As a police officer I'm going to refrain from encouraging underage flamethrower making.

But it would probably be useful.

[itsnotaonesie]

That's okay. Let's just say I'm eighteen, it's not like nobody can prove otherwise.

[theweakhavepurpose]

I don't even think the aliens from other planets would believe you were eighteen.

[Nice try Peter.]

[itsnotaonesie]

Hey, I'm almost there! I've been here a few months now, I'm getting close!

I... Think? Oh God, what month is it? What year is it? This place sucks.

[theweakhavepurpose]

Well it was 2018. But who fucking knows.

Also that's for me. I met someone from 2030. And someone from 2050. So time is pretty irrelevant.

But you still look twelve.

[itsnotaonesie]

2018, okay. Cool, that's when I'm from. My friend Tinya's from like, 3000 something though, so. I mean, what even is time anymore.

And I totally don't look twelve, you're exaggerating.

[no peter, you just look 12.]

[theweakhavepurpose]

And she can fly. She's cheating.

[All you folks with powers need to get off his lawn.]

You absolutely do. You're going to get carded going to PG-13 movies.

[itsnotaonesie]

Oh my God, right!? It's so unfair. Like, it's the coolest thing I've ever seen, but it's still totally unfair. It's a hundred times cooler than sticking to walls.

[maybe Pratt just needs to get bit by a radioactive wolf and get his own cool powers]

Oh, come on. At least give me fourteen.

[theweakhavepurpose]

She's flying around and I have to take these dumb boats from island to island like a pleb.

[This is Far Cry, it would turn him into some sort of Judge Werewolf who would be under Jacob's control and Adelaide would write fanfic about them. It would be terrible.]

Maybe if the lighting was bad.

[itsnotaonesie]

Boats are the worst. If my flamethrower works, I am so building a jet pack next.

[It might not explode. Also maybe don't get bit by a radioactive wolf because that really does sound terrible.]

That's good enough, I'll take it.

[theweakhavepurpose]

You're telling me, I get seasick. Isn't the problem with a functioning jetpack that it would roast your feet off?

[Maybe don't do that? And he's trying not to get bitten. The radioactive wolves like him.]

[itsnotaonesie]

Yeah, probably. Unless I could come up with some sort of flame resistant material to make some kinda suit out of, but we probably don't have the resources for that sooooo, I'm just gonna scrap the jet pack idea for now.

[Nobody's feet are gonna get burned off. And good, befriend every radioactive wolf. Build a fluffy army.]

[theweakhavepurpose]

[He wishes. Deputy Pratt: radioactive wolf whisperer.]

We barely have the resources for regular clothes, so I think you're out of luck there. Unless someone from the lab can randomly make asbestos.

[If people can make napalm, it's not too out of the realm of possibility.]

Also, other than it looking really fucking cool, it might not be that useful. These islands aren't that big.

[itsnotaonesie]

Asbestos is probably more trouble than it's worth, it's probably best that we just don't have it around to mess with.

It's not like we have to cross the entire ocean to get from one island to the next, I guess i can just deal with boats.

[theweakhavepurpose]

[And a dream to look really cool and fly around dies.]

Yeah yeah. Being rational is no fun sometimes.

[itsnotaonesie]

[what if we attach jets to the boats]

It's no fun any time, but it's a necessary evil I guess.

[theweakhavepurpose]

[he likes the way you think!]

Yeah. Bummer.

At least the range will give us something to do when we're wishing we could fly around and shoot laser beams out of our hands or whatever other cool things people can do here. When I get it all set up come test your aim. Maybe learn how to throw knives so you can skewer a fish from 100 yards away.

[itsnotaonesie]

[EXCELLENT]

I guess learning some crazy knife tricks could be cool? I'm not really much of a gun person, though.