Video

[theweakhavepurpose]

[The video opens on a pile of wood, sticks, shrubbery, and chunks of what might have been siding, all piled into a very obvious pyramid surrounded by rocks.]

So everything has sucked recently. Back home in Montana, when shit got rough we'd always get together and have a big bonfire. Get drunk, make s'mores, all that stuff. It didn't make things better but at least you forgot about it for a little while.

Worth a try right?

[He sounds like he's honestly asking. He's trying really hard to be positive for once.]

I've got some graham crackers, chocolate, and other things for roasting. No marshmallows though so if anyone wants to come through in the clutch it would be appreciated.

I'm lighting this up tonight at dusk, so if you want in, be there. I've only got so much to burn and it might not last more than an hour or two.

((OOC: Feel free to use this like a log and make top levels and do action things. Go forth and get some bonfire mingling on!))

Comments

[theweakhavepurpose]

Have you tried the time honored tradition of putting a second plate upside down on top?

[Bachelor living life hack.]

Trust me, no one is going to want to feast on those things. It tastes like wet cardboard. It's fine, I'll get more canned things at the stores to replace them. At least that stuff might have actually been food at one point.

[aroundthecoroner]

Second plate. That's genius.

[He genuinely hadn't thought of that. Mind blown.]

If they taste so bad, why'd you stock up on them? For the chocolate?

[Not everything is about chocolate, Michael.]

[theweakhavepurpose]

If you microwave it like that it kinda steams it too. So it takes less time.

[Bro he is a master at the microwave.]

In case the stores stopped stocking food again. I could pass them out and no one would starve. They wouldn't be happy eating it, but at least they'd all be okay.

And we used them on one of the expeditions to the Null bunker. So they've served their purpose.

[aroundthecoroner]

That's a pretty smart idea, actually. I mean, the plate thing too, but I mostly meant the whole storing food for a shortage thing. Maybe we should all do that.

[theweakhavepurpose]

It's been useful before, when everyone vanished, when they moved the city and not the stores, a couple of times.

I'll restock on canned stuff after this, but the MRE's made their sacrifice, and now we have chocolate. Worth it.

[aroundthecoroner]

[Michael takes another bite of his sub-par-but-infinitely-better-than-nothing treat.]

Yeah. Worth it. Thanks, by the way.

[theweakhavepurpose]

No problem. Figured I'd try and get people together so we'll at least be miserable in a group. I think that's how you're supposed to combat depression or something.

Hell I don't know.

[aroundthecoroner]

I'm not sure that's exactly how it works? But then I'm not like, an actual doctor, so.

[He shrugs.]

This works for me.

[theweakhavepurpose]

Shocking everyone the mental healthcare benefits in law enforcement are really fucking terrible. So I have no idea.

Maybe we can get more chocolate somehow. Or get better party facilities. A bonfire in freezing cold isn't really ideal.

[aroundthecoroner]

Yeah I believe it. I see the stuff you guys have to deal with. It's a lot less than pretty, and I doubt they pay nearly enough for all the therapy it'd take to erase it.

[He's sort of used to seeing dismembered bodies, but even he's not immune to the effects of human-on-human violence.]

Maybe we could ask the gods for it? But, uh, one of the easier ones to deal with.

[theweakhavepurpose]

My therapy involves drowning myself in beer and too much pizza on my couch and pretending everything is okay. Or that's what I tried anyway, no clue if it would have worked long term. Guess I'll never find out.

[Well this isn't the uplifting bonfire conversation he'd been intending, seems he's a dark shadow on everything.]

I suggested a big feast before we all get murdered by the Null to Tranquility. But I dunno if he'll follow through.

[aroundthecoroner]

[He's guessing he'll never find out on account of all the cult stuff, so it's best to just leave that one alone.]

A feast isn't a bad idea, whether we die or not. Kind of like a pep rally, right? Get everyone in an optimistic mood.

[theweakhavepurpose]

That was the idea. And I specified "where nothing bad happens" so they don't try and fuck with us during it. But I assume if it actually happens there'll be something where drinking the punch knocks us out and when we wake up we can't feel happiness anymore or something.

[aroundthecoroner]

If it's Tranquility, then I guess maybe we all just get super high from whatever we eat. That's not technically bad? Though I guess someone could have a bad trip.

[theweakhavepurpose]

I'd rather not.

[Though even he has to admit having a really good trip in the Bliss might be nice and relaxing right now.]

We'll see if he even follows through before I start worrying about tripping balls off of hallucinogenic crab cakes or something.

[aroundthecoroner]

God, crab cakes.

[Hallucinogenic or not, he would eat the first one he saw.]

Not that the chocolate isn't satisfying, but it sure isn't the only thing I miss.

[theweakhavepurpose]

I know. I shouldn't talk about food. I mentioned Reuben's to someone and spent all day fucking fantasizing about sandwiches.

[He probably would too. Fuck he misses food.]

I asked for a Starbucks too. No go on that one.

[aroundthecoroner]

I mean, I guess we have the coffee cart.

[Which is an improvement, but it's not the sickly-sweet sugar rush that Starbucks is.]

But man. Lobster rolls. Chinese food. Pizza. I know I'm not helping, but let me have the fantasy.

[theweakhavepurpose]

No you're making it so much worse!

I hadn't even thought about Chinese food before now. Man. That would be amazing for how fucking cold it is, have some egg flower soup and sit by the window and watch the cold.

Fuck.

[aroundthecoroner]

God, sorry. [He's not sorry.] One of the magic types around here really needs to learn to magic up some good food.

[But not him, because he's still a magic baby.]

[theweakhavepurpose]

Taako made spaghetti out of magic once, but it was with an MRE that was supposed to be spaghetti. I don't know that we have anything even remotely resembling chow mein.

[aroundthecoroner]

Damn.

[But while they're at it...]

Were there any other MREs worth magic-ing into actual food?

[theweakhavepurpose]

The other ones I had were pasta primavera, chili and one that just said PORK in all caps. Even if I wasn't a vegetarian I wouldn't try my luck at mystery pork.