one ❀ voice

[unknowable]

[There's no video, because it's too dark in the coffin to show anything anyway. Adam's voice is carefully steady, as if he's keeping himself under control through sheer power of will.]

I saw that Fear said our air supply will be refreshed. I don't know if that's true - I don't know if we can trust him - but I thought people ought to know anyway.

[Not that he necessarily believes anything any of the gods say, but - well. Who knows.]

Talking is a little less impersonal than text. It might help to hear a familiar voice, if any of your friends are buried. There also isn't much to do down here but panic, so if anyone wants to talk - I wouldn't mind.

Comments

[whichend]

No, but the connection is best with her. I haven't had the wolf dreams since I came here.

[ And as time goes on, there's a part of her body or mind that misses it more and more. Sometimes Arya swears she needs to slip into something else, because either her mind can't take being in her body or her body wants a rest from her mind. ]

I don't know. I have no idea how it works, or what the limits are. I can barely control it. It's probably dangerous, but I don't know what the danger is, exactly.

[ She thinks for a moment. ]

I know that I keep the memories from the wolf dreams, and sometimes I feel as though I'm keeping more than that. The longer I stay in an animal, I think, the more animal-like my mind becomes, and the harder it is to leave.

[unknowable]

That kind of thing is usually dangerous. When I scry, there's always a chance I won't be able to come back to myself.

[But usually it's worth it, or at least it's important enough to be a little risky. Adam is not the overprotective type - of course he doesn't want Arya to come to any harm, and he'll dislike anyone who causes it, but if it's her own choice and done with care, he doesn't think there's necessarily anything wrong with that.

But there's no way to tell how dangerous that sort of thing could really be, if she could really lose herself like that and become an animal. Adam is quiet for a moment before he carefully offers:]

If you'd like to try, I might be able to help you. I can't promise anything, but I've done... not similar things, but things that are a tiny bit like that. But it might be too dangerous.

[whichend]

It might be.

[ Arya admits, but that doesn't mean she's giving up. Help or no help, she knows she needs a wolf-dream, or a bird-dream or something. Like her revenge quest, the dreams are a coping mechanism, a means of escape when the human world is too much. Wolves don't have the same kinds of problems. ]

I just don't know which animal I'd become. Entering the mind of one of the monsters seems risky and unnecessarily scary, but there aren't any other animals I'm familiar with here.

[ Except Chainsaw, but she doubts Ronan wants her inside his bird. ]

And I know another person would not want to share minds.

[ And she doesn't really want to share hers. ]

[unknowable]

There are some fish in the lake, but that might be too strange.

[He can't imagine that a fish's mind is anything like a wolf's or a cat's. Certainly nothing like a human. And the monsters - no, that's definitely too dangerous, especially if Arya could lose herself there.

Adam doesn't even consider Chainsaw. She's not just a bird, she's Ronan's bird, part of him. Adam would never be willing to do that.]

I think a few people here have dogs, too, but... I don't know. I guess right now there isn't much to be done.

[Not anything safe, anyway. Not as if it would be safe regardless of what she used, but - Adam thinks they could make it safer, if they tried, but there isn't really a way to do that right now.]

[whichend]

I do not think fish have much of a mind to inhabit.

[ If the mind is too small, will inhabiting it be like a cage? Arya doesn't want to test that. She can barely handle this coffin, and it's big enough for her entire body. ]

Sharing a mind with someone's dog may be too...intimate.

[ She doesn't trust any of the dog owners enough. ]

I will find a way. Perhaps the Door will bring in an animal instead of a human or a monster. It's possible.

[ Not likely, but better safe than sorry. ]

[unknowable]

It is. I hope it does, so that you can try it.

[It sounds like it might be helpful to her, or maybe it's just something that she misses. Either way, Adam doesn't want that ability to be taken from her for good. That would be deeply unfair.]

If there's ever anything I can do to help... well, I've got some experience with magic, at least.

[Not that it necessarily counts for much. Not that it's even very similar. But it's something, at least.

He could offer to let her in his head, but Adam wouldn't wish that on anyone, for any reason.]

[whichend]

I will be sure to ask you, once all this is over.

[ Arya just hopes it ends with both of them alive. It's no guarantee, of course, but to say the unthinkable would be too close to giving up, and she won't do that. She hasn't yet, and she's not about to start now.

There's a pause before Arya speaks again. ]

Do you know what we say to the lord of death, Adam?

[ A beat. ]

"Not today."

Please take care of yourself, even here.

[unknowable]

[He's quiet for a moment, and when he speaks again his voice is a little softer.]

You too, Arya. We'll see each other again soon.

[It's not quite a promise, because Adam can't promise that when they might both die, but it's the closest he can get.]

Thank you.