✘ Round 4 | [Audio]

[glacius]

[It's time for someone who rarely accesses the network to rear his head again, driven to desperation as the days have ticked by and he's failed to find even a trace of one of his closest friends. That being said when Glacius speaks there's an uncharacteristic urgency tinting his voice, worry bubbling just underneath the surface.] Kate Galloway. Has--has anyone seen or heard from her recently?

[Realizing that in his haste to get to the point he's left out some details, he dials it back a bit:] She's, ah, a human woman. Brightly-colored hair. Worked at the clinic, primarily. I... haven't seen a trace of her ever since the masquerade and...

... Please. [His voice finally wavers noticeably, resignation clashing up against his innate tendency to hope again hope. This can't be how it goes.] I need someone to tell me she's still here.

Comments

voice;

[hasitsthorns]

[ No one's ever really ready, Rose is convinced. Her hope on this matter, however, was something else Haven ruthlessly stripped from her. ]

Is this your first time losing someone you were close to?

voice;

[glacius]

... It was.

Makers, I suppose I am being rather pathetic about this if it is that obvious. [But for once in his life he just can't seem to scrape his composure together like usual. This is different even from the worst of the shit that gets slung at them. It's a deeper, far more personal hurt, and it's one he doesn't have a hope of mending.]

voice;

[hasitsthorns]

No, it's-

[ Ah, jeez. ]

Don't feel bad. Let yourself grieve. It fucking sucks, it really does. I've just... I was somewhere before here, like this. People cycled through like it was a revolving door. I saw four iterations of one of my good friends, near the end of my time there. It was rough.

So I'm a little desensitized to it, I guess. It stings a little less each time. I wish I could care more, but it's hard when all I can think nowadays is 'of course they left, everyone does eventually.'

[ Everyone but her. ]

voice;

[glacius]

[Let yourself grieve. Somehow, that one piece of advice catches Glacius' complete attention... and he realizes a moment later it's because it's the same one he's offered to his partner time and time again whenever he started to tear himself down for the various losses suffered over the course of his life. Deciding he'd be hypocritical not to listen, the alien pauses, takes a moment to cycle through a breath through himself.]

I appreciate you attempting to calm me. But... your words... are not exactly comforting. [Losing one has been bad enough. He doesn't want to have to face the knowledge that others might very well do the same one day. He also doesn't want to have to figure out what that means for his ever-persistent desire to go home, knowing it would also mean losing them.

Is there no way he can win any more?]

voice;

[hasitsthorns]

They're not supposed to be. It's the reality of the situation.

[ He might not want to face it but he'll be forced to likely sooner rather than later. That was one of the cruelest lessons Haven had taught her. Just because she wasn't ready didn't mean it wasn't going to happen.

Sorry Glacius, in perfect world you could have your cake and eat it too. But this is Hadriel, that was Haven, and they can't have everything. ]

I am sorry though. It doesn't get easier, but... you deal with it better, I think.

voice;

[glacius]

One can only hope. [Normally he might give a slight, self-depreciating chuckle at that... but he's really not in the mood. He's aware that he's being a bit of a sad sack but in this situation he feels it is warranted; he'll need time to process this grief, the likes of which he has never known, before he can start scraping together his strength again.]