[Text] (With Pictures!)

[aroundthecoroner]

So it's day 2 of Ikea madness,
and I figured we should set up some kind of cragslist situation,
so that people can get rid of things they really don't want.
Or if you for some reason feel like filling your house with this stuff
follow your dreams?

Anyway I found this yesterday:

[Attached is a photo of a very odd table, the front half of it, anyway. It's sticking out of an apartment wall at an odd angle, legs mostly horizontal. There's a second photo of the back half, which appears to be in another room.

A jacket is hanging off of one of the hooves. Looks like someone has found a use for it, at least.]

If anyone knows how to get this out of the wall
without like, destroying said wall
they're welcome to it.
But to be honest I'm kind of getting used to it.
Might call it "Dave".
This I'm not too keen on:

[Another image, this one of a kind of unsettling chair.]

Frankly you can just have it.
Please.

[Everyone is welcome to post their new furniture they don't want, or offers to acquire more. Michael is not going to moderate, but it's a platform at least!]

Comments

[aroundthecoroner]

[Oh Delmar you sweet summer child(?).]

I'm an autopsy technician.
I perform autopsies.

[imhisaunt]

[Oh dear. Ok. Not ideal. But Delmar refuses to be so easily defeated]

Now don't sell yourself short, young man. Let's see, let's see....

[His hands flutter a bit as he think]

Well. For a job like that certainly you must be good with precision and have good attention to detail....yes?

[aroundthecoroner]

[Michael appreciates Delmar's attempts, at least.]

I mean I guess.
I'm not sloppy if that's what you mean.
Oh, wait.
I went to med school, but I didn't finish.
Still, I know some stuff.
Not as good as magic or whatever,
but I could probably patch somebody up in a pinch?

[imhisaunt]

There you go!

[Delmar beams, hands flying upward in a gesture of his enthusiasm]

See! You are very useful. Very important.

text --> audio

[aroundthecoroner]

[That is like, the nicest thing anyone has ever said to him. Just for that, Michael rewards Delmar with some audio.]

Hey, thanks. What's your name, anyway?

[imhisaunt]

Well you are very welcome.

[What a nice person! ]

Oh, I'm sorry, that was rude of me not to introduce myself. My name is Delmar. And you are...?

[aroundthecoroner]

Nah, it's fine. I'm Michael. Nice to meet you?

[Nailed it.]

[imhisaunt]

It has been a pleasure meeting you, Michael. I am so very glad there are very kind people here.

[Ok. So you are really the first who is solidly in the 'nice' category but still. It's exciting!]

[aroundthecoroner]

[And that's another thing he's not sure anyone's ever said about him. Michael wouldn't consider himself kind, exactly. That comes with deliberate mercy and thoughtfulness. Selflessness, maybe.

Michael's not selfless at all. He's just a pushover.]

Yeah, good to know it's not all assholes.

[imhisaunt]

Oh I would find it hard to believe that everyone here would be- [He falters, not wanting to use that word] --unpleasant.

[aroundthecoroner]

[Sorry Delmar, he's got a potty mouth sometimes.]

Well, I don't know. For all I know this place only kidnaps mean people? Though I guess I met some decent ones the first day. So... there's more of them out there.

[There. That's optimistic right?]

[imhisaunt]

Precisely [A smile] There must be more. [He then affirms this declaration with a little nod of his head]