hadriel | [Text] (With Pictures!)

So it's day 2 of Ikea madness,
and I figured we should set up some kind of cragslist situation,
so that people can get rid of things they really don't want.
Or if you for some reason feel like filling your house with this stuff
follow your dreams?

Anyway I found this yesterday:

[Attached is a photo of a very odd table, the front half of it, anyway. It's sticking out of an apartment wall at an odd angle, legs mostly horizontal. There's a second photo of the back half, which appears to be in another room.

A jacket is hanging off of one of the hooves. Looks like someone has found a use for it, at least.]

If anyone knows how to get this out of the wall
without like, destroying said wall
they're welcome to it.
But to be honest I'm kind of getting used to it.
Might call it "Dave".
This I'm not too keen on:

[Another image, this one of a kind of unsettling chair.]

Frankly you can just have it.
Please.

[Everyone is welcome to post their new furniture they don't want, or offers to acquire more. Michael is not going to moderate, but it's a platform at least!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Well damn. At least there's still that serial killer to fall back on! Speaking of which-]

What counts as a major crime?
Like, serial killers?
Or terrorism?

[Indeed! And another serial killer or two, and some mass-murders, and other generally unpleasant people.]

Terrorism is usually handled by a different division that specializes in it. We mostly deal with murders, including a few serial killers, yes.

[But typically the murders are more the crime of passion type, which are still tragic and pointless but still thankfully not the cold, unfaltering evil that most serial killers operate under.]

[Cold, unfaltering evil, huh? Awkward.]

So do the local police have to call you in?
Or do you take some cases by choice?
You'd think I'd know more about this,
but I don't.
I'm not even the one who testifies in court most of the time.

[Hey, again it's only most!]

I work in Washington D.C., so a lot of cases just end up falling under our jurisdiction for various reasons.

How many times have you ended up testifying?

Just twice.

[He didn't test well.]

I've been at it for a year and a half
so I'm not sure if that's a lot or a little.
But to be honest
it's the actual pathologist who does most of the court appearances.
Since her name's on the paperwork.
And that makes sense I guess
you being in the literal capital and all.

It's hard to say if it's a lot or a little, especially since there's a pathologist to do so instead, and I assume you probably don't have many cases that require court testimony anyway?

[Most cases aren't murder, after all.]

There is a pretty high murder rate where I live.

[7th highest in the country, as a matter of fact. Michael knows this fact maybe a little too off the top of his head.]

But a lot of the time
yeah, there's no need for testimony.
The cause of death isn't always being contested
or like,
brought up as part of the case.
Come to think of it,
this is probably something you have to do too.

Where is that?

[Since he recognized Washington D.C. Lance thinks Michael's probably from Earth, at least, so might as well ask.]

I do, yes, and more often now that I'm actually an agent and involved in investigations in the field.

Columbus.

[It's not as exciting as D.C., but surprisingly dangerous.]

Is you being an agent a new development?

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