hadriel | ☢ audio

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[Newt has definitely not been up all night building salamander-proof enclosures out of spare Null parts so the fact that he sounds both tired and revved up on way too much coffee is just your imagination.]

Two questions, Hadriel. One: Tell me about the cave monsters. What all has crashlanded here before I got here? Specifically, I'm looking for stuff that a person could feasibly, like, catch. Or at least put down and drag into town for some post-mortem studying. This includes stuff that might be a good food source, maybe? I don't know. Depends on what's out there.

[The food source thing is secondary in his mind, but the masses don't need to know that. He's already expecting to catch some flak for this.]

And two: Anyone got some time to help me wrangle some salamanders, at least? I'm thinkin' two should be good. I'd like to grab some other stuff too, but again, depends on what's out there. Gonna start with the salamanders for now.

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Yeah, I know it's risky, but I can handle risky. I've built some pretty sturdy enclosure's for 'em, and I'll be keeping 'em in my house, so no harm done to anyone else if something goes wrong.

[Other than loose salamanders, but look that's not gonna happen. He is an expert!]

The dead ones would still be plenty useful, anyway. Can't dissect living ones, after all. [He laughs.]

That's the goal, but honestly, we're a long way off from actually, like, doing it. The plan right now would be to use the Door itself to get back, but... Obviously, there's a lot of hoops to jump through before we can pull that off. Still, figuring out the science is a step in the right direction.

[He's an eternal optimist.]

Unless your house catches stuff next to it on fire. Then you got a whole bunch of stuff burnin' down.

[Someone's not so much of an optimist.]

You could do it to something alive, but everyone would think you were really screwed in the head if you tried. Dead's probably a lot easier to get anyway. Can't think of how anyone would carry one to you if it was alive.

It all sounds like a good idea, but if its just you and that other guy workin' on it do you really think you should keep those fiery things 'round? Sounds like a good way for you to, you know, die. Might not be a lot of the rest of us who could pick up where you left off.

Look, it's not gonna burn down, okay? I'm being way safe about this, I promise. I'll just let 'em go if they prove to be too much of a hassle.

[Which, yes, he will do this thing, but they're not going to be a hassle so it's not going to matter!! He is not giving up on his dream, Girl, no matter how much you want to responsibility check him.

Though, let's be honest, someone needs to.]

Uh. Yeah, I'm not gonna try to dissect a living one. That'd be suicidal, not to mention, yeah, screwed in the head. [You have a way with words, kid.] But the cages I built are portable, so the plan is to just herd some salamanders into it. Should work just fine.

[He's about to get all huffy until she drops the line about how he's one of few that could do this kind of research. Okay, she at least gets that, which makes her point... Valid, unfortunately.]

Thing is, I've heard all this before. Back home, I did plenty of dangerous stuff that no one thought was worth it, but I ended up saving the whole damn planet with the stuff I learned from it. It paid off. You can't learn anything worth knowing if you aren't willing to get your hands dirty, y'know? These salamanders are small fry compared to the stuff I work on back home. I'm qualified, trust me.

Probably better to get someone to shoot 'em rather than just let 'em run wild.

[Girl doesn't like acting responsible, but she's gotten used to it. Between her and Ghoul someone has to be.]

Have a feelin' that it'll be as tricky as herdin' cats, but if you think it'll work. I'd try to chase 'em toward the water and catch 'em there. [Safety first, guys.] At least it'd give y'all a quick way to put out the fire if they light someone up.

You saved the world? [She sounds surprised. And rather curious. It's not often she gets to meet fellow 'I saved humanity' types.] Doin' was always more of the thing for me than learnin'. But it still applies, I guess. Gotta go through a lotta shit to see things things to the end. [She sighs.] Anybody agreed to help you yet?

Well, yeah. [He lowers his voice, even though that's not gonna make a difference.] But everyone keeps freaking out about animal rights and stuff, so I wasn't about to say that.

[...Huh. Those aren't bad ideas, actually?]

Yeah, I'll try that. Thanks for the tip. They're small enough to where I don't think it's gonna be too much of an issue.

[Then again, that might just make them tougher to deal with... It's fine!!]

I did, yeah. We were getting invaded by this massive aliens and, long story short, I was the only one with the guts to study them, and my research is what clinched the victory for us. And I mean, I did my research through doing, I guess? Biology is hands-on. Doing and learning go hand in hand, y'know.

[And, hm. He's not sure enlisting a kid is the safest idea, but she seems to know what's up? This is probably fine.] A couple folks have signed up, but the more the merrier. I'm not gonna turn down another offer if that's what this is.

Animal rights? [She's never heard of such a thing. It's almost laughable.] They can kill, they ain't pets. Are those people loco?

No problem. Better safe than charcoal.

Like, space ship kinda aliens? [There's a thread of childish enthrallment in her voice.] Those things are real? I guess you don't got a lotta time to talk 'bout it right now if you got the lizards to chase, but I got a lotta questions.

It's pretty much an offer. I might do something useful and make sure the whole place don't get sent up in flames. 'side, if I help out I figure that means you kinda have to tell me if you found something because of the creatures. Equal trade and all.

[Newt laughs. This girl knows what's up.] My thoughts exactly. Like, I don't plan on abusing the things for fun. What kind of scientist would I be if I pulled that crap? Give me some credit.

[He is so offended by Hadrielites' priorities as of late. And their lack of faith. Jeez.]

Uhh, sort of? The ones we were getting invaded by were really big, like, monsters, basically? Like Godzilla. You heard of Godzilla? But they got sent to us through this interdimensional rift, and they were genetically engineered by, uh, sure, spaceship kind of aliens. They were kind of bug-looking, I guess. They never made it to Earth, though. [He pauses, something revolutionary occurring to him.] I'm the only person on the planet that knows what they look like, actually. Well, me and Hermann, but mostly me. I was first.

[Being first is important. He's gonna be the one to get the credit, so help him.

As for the rest of it, he snorts.] Sounds equal to me. I'll even tell you more about the aliens, if you're interested. Deal?

A mad scientist?

I dunno who Godzilla is. From the name- is it a god? But big bugs? That's creepy. [She says it like she finds it anything but.] So you're like the only guy to make first contact? You gotta be, like, a legend for that. People would be spittin' campfire stories 'bout that for years back home. They would 'bout the aliens too. I mean, damn. [She thought a mind control army was the worst she'd ever hear of.] Interdimensional monsters are pretty next level to to fight.

Story time on top of it? You gotta deal, tech-brain. I'll shake on it when I see you.

Hah, yeah, I guess that's what I'd be. [He's definitely been called a mad scientist more than once back home, but he's never thought he truly fit the definition. Case in point.

BUT!!! Oh man, Girl super knows what's up. He is a legend, thanks for noticing.]

Godzilla's a lizard, but he walks around on two legs and he's massive. Like, skyscraper massive. He levels cities and stuff. The Kaiju were doing the same thing. Taking out cities, killing loads of people... Humanity was, like, on the verge of extinction. If not in numbers then in timing. I figured out how to, yeah, make contact with 'em like literally right before they invaded en masse and just obliterated the planet.

[His voice has the slightest tint of fear to it, though. Man, it really was close. Way too close. He doesn't like thinking about how close it was. It's awesome that he saved the world in the eleventh hour, sure, but wow was that almost the actual end of the world.]

Anyway, uh, yeah, I'll give the gory details later. Thanks, by the way. [...Wait.] Hey, what's your name?

As long as you own up to it. [She laughs quietly. The best people she knows are all a little unhinged. She finds it endearing by this point.]

You know, there's a time when I would've thought a giant lizard was cool shit, but after the past few months- [She huffs loudly. This place was taking the fun out of everything.] Pretty cool that you could stop something like that. I'm gonna look forward to the dirty details of how. World went and pretty much ended back home, kinda nice to hear 'bout people hittin' the break on the apocalypse.

[She wistful about it. What kid didn't grow up hearing snatches of stories about before and wondering what life could have been if the bombs hadn't fell? It was an escape to imagine worlds where things turned out better.]

I don't got one of those.

No kidding? That, uh, sounds pretty crappy. [The fact that she's alive to talk about it means the apocalypse can't have been that bad, though. If the Kaiju had won, humanity would've been decimated.] You'll have to tell me about it sometime.

[But, uh, record scratch!!!]

You... don't have a name? How does that work?

Yeah, I guess. [Crappy was a bit of an understatement, in her opinion. But she's gotten the gist that most of the people here had a terrible life before this.] I'll answer any questions you got 'bout it, sure.

[The questions that follow make her sigh heavily.]

Works just fine. People pick their names where I'm from and I ain't picked one yet. I know when people are talkin' to me.

[Sorry Girl he's hung up on this now. He's encountered a lot of weird cultural customs in Hadriel, but this has got to be the weirdest.]

So why don't you just, like... Pick one? What are people supposed to do when they're talking about you?

[She sighs, a little uncomfortable because he technically was right. She was a teenager, grown by Zone standards and more than old enough to take a name. But with the only people she wanted to tell that name gone...]

I just haven't. And people give me nicknames if they worry so much 'bout me not havin' one. There weren't many kids in the Zones, so when I was younger it didn't matter anyway. Just had to mention the lil' one and people would know.

Huh. Your world sounds pretty different from mine. [Which usually isn't enough to make him back off, but by "pretty different" he means "really different," which means he'll need an entire new conversation to understand her world's setup. Later, then.]

You'll have to tell me about that sometime, too. Where I'm from, our parents name us. My dad named me after Isaac Newton. [He says this like she should know what that means, but then remembers she probably doesn't.] He's this really influential scientist that laid a lot of the groundwork for physics and astronomy. Naming people after other people is a popular move. You could always name yourself after someone like that.

[As if she hasn't already thought of that, but look, he's trying to help.]

Way I hear it, it's pretty different from everywhere. [She doesn't find that a bad thing. Other worlds are better off being nothing like her own.]

Huh. Most people I know don't have parents anymore to give 'em anything, let alone a name. [She starts to chuckle, then cuts herself off when she realizes that's kind of dark.] Is that why your interested in bein' a tech-brain, so you can live up to the name?

No. No way. You can't take someone's name. Not back home. A name's not just what people call you, in the Zone's it's tied into who you are. Takin' the name would be like stealin' their identity.

Yeah? Weird how some worlds are closer than others. There's a ton of people from somewhere similar to where I'm from, but with some key differences. Like, we're all from Earth--and timeline-wise we're even clustered within about the same fifty years--but with major differences. Some people have magic, for example. And I haven't met anyone else whose Earth has been invaded by Kaiju.

[His planet got lucky, clearly. Yaaay...

He laughs too, though a little uneasily. It's dark, sure, but sometimes you have to laugh at the dark stuff. But also: He's not familiar with her world, so maybe this isn't something to laugh at? She's laughing, though. It's probably fine.]

I mean, where I'm from, parents name kids at birth. My dad had my name picked out before I was born. [He wonders briefly if her culture functions more reptile-style, like parents leaving clutches of eggs to hatch and fend for themselves from the get-go. It's... unlikely, maybe, but also, they're just voice chatting. She could be a lizard person for all he knows. He literally already knows a lizard person, so that wouldn't be the weirdest thing.

As for the question...]

Uh, not really? Not my first name, anyway. And my family's more musical than anything, but my uncle's the one that got me into engineering. Plus, Newton's all physics and math. I'm a biologist. [The superior form of science, judging by his tone. He can't admit that physics and math are also cool. Hermann might overhear him, even from universes away.]

Hm. [A weird cultural difference, but then again, maybe not that weird. Not any weirder than Germany making people submit applications to name their kids. His dad complains a lot about the lengths he had to go through to name him Newton... What a world.] I guess that checks out. Sounds like it would get tough after a while, though. If everyone in my world had to have a different name, man... That'd be rough. There's, like, a million Johns running around.

Right? Like half the people I've talked to are goin' on 'bout what's normal for them and it's no shit I've ever heard of. Still usin' bullets and havin' countries that haven't existed for ages. It's wild.

[Most people probably wouldn't find it funny, even most adults back home. But she doesn't know what she's missing by not having parents and it's much easier to laugh than feel bad.]

Not a lot of kids are born out in my parts. Be a lil' like countin' your chickens to pick out a name, you know? Even without what names mean to us. [Hell, she's still the only child she knows that lived out in the Zones from infancy. All of the others were raised in the City before escaping.]

Music, huh? [Her voice brightens.] Kinda an odd leap from tunes to science. Not sure I've heard of any biologists. What is it that you do?

A million? Geez, I don't know if there's ever been that many people 'round home. [Before the war, there were billions in the world. But that information was lost on her. All she knew was the people of the City and the Zones, an was left none the wiser to the ways the world used to work.] I mean, there was maybe a couple hundred in the Zones the whole time I've been alive. And most of 'em are dead now. Probably a couple thousand in the City, if you count all the droids and bots too. But that's it. There's no one else out there so there's plenty of names to go 'round.

[Newt scratches his chin, taking a moment to ponder over all of this neat information. It's pretty far from his version of reality, sure, but...]

Countries that haven't existed for ages, huh? Y'know, it kind of sounds like you're from some post-apocalyptic version of Earth. They have stories about that kind of thing back home, but it's all fiction. Before the Kaiju invaded us, we had plenty of fictional stories about monster attacks and alien invasions and stuff, too. Funny how that sort of thing works, isn't it?

[Maybe "funny" isn't the right word, what with both of their worlds being on the brink of total destruction and stuff, but it's fine probably.]

Well, I studied engineering, too. And music. Biology's just my main gig. See, the cool thing about the sciences is that you can combine fields. Before we knew about the Kaiju, I specialized in bioengineering. Like, artificial tissue replication, genetic engineering, that sort of thing. With the right tools, life is just as malleable as the mechanical world. And, uh, music's just fun. [He laughs.]

These days, all my focus is on Kaiju. [Or, was? Maybe? Now that they've closed the Breach, he's not sure what his future holds back home.] I head up the K-Science department at PPD--uh, Pan Pacific Defense Corps. That's the global organization in charge of defending the world against Kaiju attacks. Specifically, I study whatever big-bads cross over into our universe to try to make sense of it all. My job is primarily to hunt for weaknesses, but understanding the Kaiju is so much more complicated than that.

[He could literally talk about this for years, but that's the gist.]

Wait, what do you use if you don't use bullets...?

Well, yeah. Everyone always talks 'bout the world endin'. Kinda what happens when people bomb everything that, you know, exists. Everyone knows it was the apocalypse of our own makin', the day the lights went out. I guess people used to make up stories 'bout this kinda thing before too. All monsters and mayhem. They just got it wrong. Only monsters where the people with the shiny red button to press. You're right, it's kinda funny who wrong people got it.

[It was a good laugh in a depreciation kind of way. Look how stupid the people before us were, look how innocent things used to be.]

Engineerin' like cars and shit? You could make mad credits knowin' how to fix up a junker. [She finds mechanics very respectful.] A lotta that mumbo you're talkin' 'bout is new to me. The only artificial tissue I can think of is maybe the skin they cover androids with? You don't work on 'droids do you?

Makes sense. Kinda hard not to focus on it if something's attackin' you. [Kind of like how everyone back home focused on the Dracs. When something threatened you, you had to sit up and take notice.] So you're the smart guy of the bunch, eh? You figure out the weakness so someone can kill 'me all. Not a bad gig. I'm a lil' surprised they could get the whole world to agree on a group for fightin' anything though. Big groups of people usually don't agree on much, let alone something that really has to be done.

[His people sounded a far more diplomatic than her own. She was impressed with a world that could work together instead of tear each other apart.]

Ray guns. You know, batteries and lasers and all the fun of laser burns. You don't have those?

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