hadriel | Chapter ~5~ [Video]

[Today is one of those days that the loneliness that always follows just a few paces behind Delmar has caught up with him. It's for no reason in particular. It's not been a bad day, nothing specific has happened. He woke up with it wrapped around him like a blanket he can't shrug off. It's not the oppressive, sharp type of loneliness that cause a breakdown, just a quiet kind that perhaps makes that space on the other side of the bed feel that much emptier, the quiet seem heavier, or make him look that little bit older when he gazes in the mirror.

Back home he'd escape through his television. He'd bundle himself into his favorite armchair and let himself get lost in his favorite soap opera, the romance, the drama...it'd keep him company.

But he doesn't have something like that here, so in a small attempt to distract himself, he turns to the network. He's sitting at his kitchen table when he turns on the video and perhaps looks a little bit tired. Not ill or injured, nothing like that, but perhaps the bright and chipper Delmar just seems somewhat less vibrant today.]

Do, um, do any of you have things that...that you know you'll never get to do?

[He's looking more at his fingers that are knotting nervously with each other than he is at the screen]

I've been so blessed since I came here. So many people have been so very nice to me.... I am so lucky with all my friends.... but, um--

[His hands shift then, palms now laying flat against the surface of the table]

--But sometimes its hard to not think about home.

[And how none of the wonderful things he's been given here will be there when he goes back. His thoughts try to add a hopeful 'if'...if he goes back...but today the 'if' feels like the fairy stories parents tell their children]

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[He looks uncertain, not sure exactly what she means by 'I know what you mean'. Does she feel the same way? Or...or does she know other people who feel that way?]

Do you think about home a lot, Miss Kyna?

Yeah. I miss it a lot, but it's going to suck to leave everyone here.

What is home like? Harlan's told me a little...he told me about um the show with the spacemen in the colorful sweaters, and the 'internet'.... It all sounds so exciting.

[And overwhelming].