[video] this may come as a surprise but I am not a mechanical engineer

[nonscriptum]

[There's a lot of crap going on right now, sure, and whatever the more overtly-powered people have done to subdue the recent catastrophe has helped, but that doesn't mean he can continue to put certain things on his to-do list on the perpetual backburner.

Continuing his mapping and documentation process, for one. Reach out to the populace with a completely innocent, well-meaning inquiry, for another.

Also avoid dying, but that's just a general to-do these days.]

This might be a weird question, but does anyone here know how to craft...small items? Like a smith, or a carpenter, or some combination thereof?

Asking for a- [There is an awkward beat as he tries to determine whether the statement is accurate.] -friend.

Comments

[nonscriptum]

...if by "robe" thing you mean "dramatically flourished with it" like a musketeer or something, then yeah.

[It was, without a doubt, one of the most Extra things Nate has ever seen. And he's met Taako!]

[pocketspa]

Oh yeah, absolutely. Just holds out his hands and lets it drape. He's so full of it right?

[Taako's grin should make it apparent how Into It he is.]

Fuckin' dork. Man, then he gave you the whole show. Count yourself lucky, you basically know everything now.

[nonscriptum]

[Absolute drama queen assholes. He really should have expected this from a boyfriend of Taako's.]

Somehow I doubt that.

[There's the small matter of wanting to better comprehend what the Hell Kravitz is, but...he can just ask.]

What is he?

[pocketspa]

[And Taako can just answer. Sadly, the answer is ridiculous and he has never explained something well in his life.]

Uhh, he's kinda, like, super dead? Sort of a skeleton but not a skeleton. It's like, uhhh...

[Hmmmmhmhmhmhmh how does he do this.]

So, when you die, you become a soul, which is basically just like, a little translucent version of you or a little ball of light or whatever. But he works for uh, Death Herself I guess, so he gets to do cool stuff like be a skeleton or look like a dude. I guess probably what he looked like before he died? I dunno.

[Should he ask that? Is it rude? Maybe not, huh.]

When I met him he was, uh, possessing a bunch of rocks and he tried to kill me. Real meet-cute. He hunts down undead peeps and drags their souls back to hell. Soooo.

[nonscriptum]

[There's a lot to unpack here, and a considerable number of strange implications regarding death and the afterlife and pretty much everything affiliated with that, but Nate tries not to get stuck on the theological ramifications of this poorly-worded explanation.]

So...he's like the grim reaper? Like a death god? Not the death god, but- you know, like debt collectors. But for souls.

[You've been served, they say as they fumble through the bureaucracy of ending someone's life. He wants to make a necrophilia joke. He wants to indulge the need to ask if scythe length has anything to do with prowess in the bedroom. But all Nate can manage is a sage, deadpan:]

Gives a whole new meaning to getting a boner, huh.

[pocketspa]

I mean not like a god, he just works for one. But he is kinda undead. Just kinda.

[But everything else is kind of thrown to the wayside as he barks out a laugh at the joke, trying not to completely lose it.]

Oh, buddy, you have no idea. Great lay whether he has a dick or not, though. Really knows how to use those hands.

[Did Taako just admit to fucking a skeleton??? Probably???? He sure doesn't seem embarrassed by that!]

[nonscriptum]

[The complex mental gymnastics that Nate suddenly has to undergo to comprehend the information that Taako unwittingly foisted upon him sends him into immediate shock, processing too slowly and yet not slow enough to really grasp the truth of the statement.

Fairly certain that Taako just confirmed necrophilia, Nate opens his mouth, closes it again, and takes a deep breath.]

Hm.

[Bad.]

That's a visual I didn't need.

[pocketspa]

[This is about the point he descends into wheezing laughter, because oh my god he can't handle it anymore. Nate's face is perfect. He'd hug him for how long he kept this joke going if they were actually next to each other.]

Too bad! You have it! Blessed with forbidden arcane skeletonfucking knowledge. You're welcome.

[Gods, Nate could hang up on him now and it will have been worth it.]

[nonscriptum]

Yep, I think that's enough of- everything. Okay.

[Bad.

Sure enough, Nate hangs up the phone.]