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Chapter ~7~ [Video]
[Delmar's phone is sitting in his lap as a thumb presses worriedly into the flesh of his lower lip. His eyes are angry red at the edges, cheeks still damp though at this moment he's not crying.]
I'm so very sorry. I'm sorry that I...
[He keeps getting to this point. He's started that sentence again and again in his mind but when he tries to finish it there's a static of thousands of things he's sorry for. He's sorry for the son his parents never had in him. For denying them that version of their lives in which their eldest son was someone they could be proud of. He's sorry for the big brother he's denied his siblings because he couldn't not be himself. Because he couldn't want to not be himself.
He's sorry that he's not sorry for who he loves. He's sorry he never tried hard enough to be sorry for it. He's sorry that he saw all those wishes that he would change. All those hopes that he would 'grow out of it' 'fix himself' 'stop being selfish' ...and tossed them away.
He's sorry because shouldn't he have done those things? Shouldn't he have put his family first? His friends?
He's sorry. Confused. Tired. And sorry he's not smart enough to finish this sentence]
.....All of these are...for all of you.
[He simply turns the phone to show a platter of row upon row of small cupcakes with 'sorry' written on them]
[And he starts to open his mouth as though to say something else. But instead he just ends the feed]
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Whatever for?
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[He flutters tearfully, waving his hands in the air in a vague gesture as he tries to figure out how to explain it]
For being disappointing...f-for...being a bad friend....for...for all of it.
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「Whatever he says won't help... will it?」
Is there... anything I can do for you, Delmar?
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D-don't be silly. You w-would have figured out how to used the washing machine...
[Because that is definitely what Atem meant, delmar.
As for the second part, he doesn't even know how to answer that. Is there something that can be done? He's already done the damage, hasn't he? Atem can't undo his Delmar's mistakes...the people he's hurt...]
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T-that's not what I meant... But also, I will always cherish how you helped me with that. Now I'm a pro at laundy thanks to you.
「The answer doesn't come, however, and Atem worries a little more.」
Why did you bake the cookies?
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[He tries to smile but ends up looking mostly forlorn]
I felt like I should. It's the only thing I'm good at.
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That's not the only thing you're good at-- ah but... I asked because, I wondered if you'd like to share some with me. I found some milk the other day.
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O-of course I'd like to share with you....
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