video

[kickingand]

[ Dean is making this brief for a variety of reasons. But he sadly doesn't care enough to make this anything but video - audio and text just seem like far too much effort, and so Dean can be seen boozing it up with a half empty bottle of whiskey he received from the gods.

Someone's been drunk a lot lately.

Big fuckin' deal. ]

So, I kind of happen to have an angel buddy who's in need of a lay. Anyone want to lend a hand?

Comments

[closerift]

I mean, can't you lend him a hand?

[ Maybe literally?? ]

[kickingand]

There's about a hundred and one reasons why my hands aren't being lent to the cause.

[ More like one reason but let's just exaggerate. ]

[closerift]

Hm. Well, if it was important enough to warrant a public message, I thought it might be a little more urgent.

[ Whatever you say, Dean. ]

[kickingand]

Of course it's urgent. We're talkin' appendicitis on crack. Still doesn't mean my hands need to be involved.

[closerift]

What's one thing got to do with another?

[ Appendicitis hardly calls for sex. Also, she seems to give up on convincing a stranger to 'take care of' his friend and sighs, shrugging weakly. ]

Fine, fine. Well, if I come across anyone else suffering from 'appendicitis on crack,' I'll be sure to point them toward... What's your friend's name?

[kickingand]

They're both-- y'know, things in need of urgent care. [ You're missing the big picture here!! ]

But, uh- Cas. Castiel.

[closerift]

Ah. [ Her lip twitches upward, amused. ] Of course they are.

I'll keep all that in mind if I find a suitable partner for... Castiel. [ Interesting name. ] Does he have any preferences?

[kickingand]

Uh- Think his preferences are no preferences.

[ That's so helpful, Dean!! ]

[closerift]

What, both men and women? Or, do you mean that he really isn't interested in that sort of thing, in which case I would wonder why you've gone to all this trouble in the first place.

[kickingand]

Pretty sure if you asked him, he wouldn't actually have a clue in either direction.

[closerift]

Ah. New to all this, is he?

[ CECILY STOP BEING A PEST ]

[kickingand]

[ is this supposed to be helping, because dean is not sure it's helping. ]

If by this you mean everything from sex to pizza rolls, then yes. He's new to it.

[closerift]

[ NAH, sorry, she's not going to be of much help here.

-- hang on: ]

What are pizza rolls?

[kickingand]

[ YOU PEOPLE. what is he going to do with you. ]

Only one of the best inventions ever made. Right after cheese whiz. [ okay now he may be fucking around, but how can you be sure...... ]

[closerift]

[ Tell them all about the marvels of the modern world? ]

I've never heard of 'pizza rolls' or 'cheese whiz.' [ She notes, lip twitching, amused. ] I'm assuming you eat them?

[kickingand]

[ Oh yeah sure, leave it to Dean to be Mr. Informative. That's a Great idea. ]

If you can even call 'em food- yeah, you 'eat em. With a lot of beer.

[closerift]

Hmm. [ "If you can call them food?" That certainly doesn't make them sound very appealing. ] Well, thank you. I learn bits and pieces about other worlds every day. I'm so much better off, now, knowing about your... pizza rolls.

[ There's an amused grin, then a low chuckle. ]

I should let you get back to your friend's urgent affairs.

[kickingand]

Everyone's better off knowin' about pizza rolls, believe me. They're the ultimate creation, after cheeseburgers. No way they can make those any better than they already are.

[ Mmmmmmm....... dean is making himself hungry, what a guy.

But yeah okay fine, return him to his duties. ]

For the moment, they're about as urgent as anything else.

[closerift]

[ She hasn't heard of 'cheeseburgers,' either, but if he loves them so much... maybe they're worth looking into. ]

In any case, best of luck.

[ With a wink, she vanishes from the feed. ]