three; video

[iustitiae]

[oh hello hadriel. it's "connor" but this isn't the silly laid back way he normally starts his posts, he looks very serious as he starts talking.]

Man, you guys are collectively the weirdest group of social media users. One day you're asking who ships what the next day you're making vague comments about something horrible someone did once. And it's always, "oh I couldn't possibly tell you what I did, but let me look for emotional support for my vast and intense guilt!" Please. You think you deserve sympathy for that?

[connor laughs, cold and bitter and shakes his head.]

I get it, I do. It's easier to not talk about it. Easier to live on the reputations you've built while you've been here and ask for help based solely on what people know than give up the ghost and actually show them the skeletons in your closet that you're so upset about. Maybe your friends will just imagine you cheated on your significant other once upon a time, or you accidentally lied to your mom, or you did something that, when we tell the whole story, actually sounds like it wasn't your fault at all. The kinds of things good people feel guilty about.

But let's face us - how many of us are actually good people? Why waste our time talking in circles about vague half-truths or covering our obviously deep-seeded issues with superfluous shitposting?

[he clears his throat and is quiet for a moment - dramatic flair, like he's about to drop some real truth bombs. (he is.)]

Here, I'll start: I killed my professor's husband with a group of friends. We covered up the murder like the good little future-lawyers that we are. We did a good job. We'll probably get away with it. Not that I'm likely to find out, since I'm stick here with all of you now.

[he's just going to let that...sink it. better to do it now before people start getting completely paranoid about the doubles than later on. but even if they figure out he's not his original - what does it matter? this wasn't some lie he was fabricating.]

That feels good, getting that out there. Now it's your turn.

Comments

voice;

[iustitiae]

I'm confessing to murder.

voice; [1/2]

[devilsavocado]

[ No shit sherlock. ]

Hold on a second.

action;

[devilsavocado]

[ MEANWHILE MATT VERY QUICKLY FINDS HIS WAY TO CONNOR'S ROOM. ]

Connor. [ He pauses, standing ramrod straight. ] Did you really kill someone?

[iustitiae]

[hello roomie, buddy, pal]

Yeah, I did.

[devilsavocado]

[ Matt stares on, voice devoid of emotion. He wants to understand but also you're showing like no remorse here, buddy! ]

What happened?

[iustitiae]

The girlfriend of one of the guys in my study group was trying to steal some information off a computer and I was with them and we killed the husband when he caught her in the act. Felony Murder.

[he pauses, but his heart doesn't really waiver. it would be different if this were regular connor, but his double doesn't give a shit about guilt or consequence.]

Go big or go home, right? [he laughs, bitter] Then we destroyed the body, cleaned the weapon and the crime scene and lied about it for months. The professor was in on it.

[devilsavocado]

[ Yeah, there's no way Connor could say all that with a straight face. Connor, who came hom from talking to Cashmere and started crying with panic? Not this guy. ]

Did any of that actually happen?

[ I mean it sounds like Cashmere knows, too. And given what Connor's said about his teacher and his grades and school...... it all adds up. ]

Did you actually kill someone, or were you complicit to the murder?

[iustitiae]

Of course it happened - why would I tell you something that didn't?

[he snaps it, irritated.]

I killed him.

[it's a strange thing - a lie that is both a lie and not. it is a lie in the sense that he wasn't the person who his sam keating with the trophy, that he wasn't the one who committed the act. but there are days that connor (the original, the double, did it matter?) believes so fully that he did it. not because he had, but because the weight of all the guilt was so heavy. because he hadn't gone to the cops. because he'd destroyed the body and the evidence. because annalise keating had yelled at him, you killed my husband, had driven that point home and made it clear that even if he didn't believe it, she could get the cops to. maybe she believed they all had, in a way. and maybe they had. so it's a lie. but it isn't a lie. he believes it and he doesn't.]

[devilsavocado]

[ Matt can hear it, a lie that wants to be true. Maybe the real Connor is under there. Maybe the guilt finally ate away his defenses. Whatever it is, Matt knows there's more to it than that. He can't say he knows the details (he doesn't know the real Connor is dead, for one thing,) but one thing is very clear: ]

Because you're not yourself.

[ Did the cave take away his inhibitions or something? Is that why he hit on Matt earlier? ]

Your professor was blackmailing you, wasn't she? You can't have all killed him.

[iustitiae]

She figured it out half-way through. Helped us clean it up.

[he will just avoid the other comment there.]

[devilsavocado]

This is what's been giving you nightmares all this time, isn't it?

[ >>Matt will remember that. ]

All of a sudden, you're fine with just telling everyone?

[iustitiae]

[wait hold on]

How do you know I've been having nightmares?

[two can play the interrogation game buddy]

[devilsavocado]

[ Oh shit!!!

...is what Matt would say if he did not already have an excuse for this prepared. ]

I could hear you back in our old place. You toss and turn in your sleep.

[iustitiae]

That's not -- that's none of your business.

[devilsavocado]

I know. I know it's not. But I was worried about you.

[ Like that makes it ok.... Whoops, guess you found out the first downside to living with Matt. No privacy ever. ]

And now I'm supposed to believe that you're okay with telling everyone about this?

[iustitiae]

Correlation doesn't imply causation.

[god matt know your fallacies are you a lawyer or what]

[devilsavocado]

Cut the bullshit.

[ It's time for tough love, Daredevil style. Because Matt is starting to get seriously concerned. ]

Something's wrong with you. Are you gonna tell me what it is?

[iustitiae]

I killed someone, how is that not enough for you?

[devilsavocado]

You'd obviously done that before you got here. It was eating you up inside.

[ Which, quite frankly, Matt finds to be a good thing. Guilt is awesome! It means you have a soul, Connor. Or had, anyway. ]

What. Changed.

[iustitiae]

[connor laughs -- it's way bitter, pretty much like the look on his face and his entire body language]

I'm sorry, do you expect me to answer after that stunt you pulled the other day? Because that's pretty much not how friendship works.

[devilsavocado]

[ Unlike some people, Matt doesn't go blabbing all his secrets on the network! Matt crosses his arms, meeting Connor's bitterness with a steeled glance his way. ]

I'd be a lot more inclined to believe you if you hadn't just told complete strangers about something that you'd probably only told Cashmere until just now.

[ Because he can guess exactly what night that was. ]

Something's changed, Connor. I'm willing to bet the cave has something to do with it. You're not acting like yourself.

[iustitiae]

And if something had? What are you going to do about it?

[because hes hearing a lot of accusations here]

[devilsavocado]

Find out how to fix it, for starters.

[ Because this new Connor is definitely not improved? Guilt is better than this, Connor. ]

Did something happen a few days ago?

[ That would explain why Connor was suddenly sunshine and come-ons....... ]

[iustitiae]

Nothing happened.

[lying]

[devilsavocado]

[ Lying Cat says LYING. So does Matt. ]

You're lying.