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first spell [video]
[The camera opens on two people, sitting shoulder to shoulder and addressing the camera head-on. Or, well... one elf and a skeleton. Taako’s face is wide in a grin, seemingly intent on emoting well enough for the two of them, and they simultaneously move to flip some hair from their faces- or well, Lup would, if she had any. The motion is still recognizable enough as they address the network.]
Helloooo, Hadriel!
[For those who remember Stepford, it might be very reminiscent of their tv show, Lup’s voice coming through loud and clear to make herself a little more recognizable.]
You’re on with the twins, and today, we have a suuuuper important thing we need you to settle.
Bee-tee-dubs, we wouldn’t even need to bother with this if my dear brother could get over himself.
[Taako gives her a look, before re-addressing the camera.] Anyway, so there’s like, transmutation magic, which is awesome and rad, and then there’s evocation, which just like, does elemental stuff or whatever, and is super lame. So if you were gonna pick one--
Yeah, no. [And Lup raises a hand to prove her point, summoning fire instantly to her skeletal palm.] Deffo cooler than anything that comes out of his specialization. Trust me, fam.
[Without even a response, a translucent, spectral hand appears behind Taako, and moving in tandem with his hand, floats into the frame and smacks Lup upside the head before disappearing.]
I can literally turn into anything I want, whenever I want. I can fly, my dude. I could be a shark.
Holy shit, Taako. Give up the shark thing. No one cares about sharks! I’m not trying to crush your game or anything, but pick a better animal.
It’s a fucking shark! What is there not to-- no, you know what, stand back, this is gonna be amazing. [He is, in fact, backing up to give himself some space with the intent to actually do it, tossing his pointy wizard hat to the side in preparation.]
And there he goes again. [Lup could not possibly sound less excited if she tried.]
Check. It. Out. [Taako winks towards the camera, hands on his hips, and then extends his arms, starting to emanate a strange sort of glow. But just before their audience can catch sight of what supremely awesome magic Taako is about to throw down, the camera shifts, pulled to a close up on Lup’s skeletal face. She tilts her head, as if smiling, effectively blocking Taako’s transformation from being seen.]
Y'know, I don’t think I’ve ever looked so good.
[Behind her, a loud and rather angry roar can be heard, that still kind of sounds a little like Taako. The voice that follows is much rougher than his normal tone, because it’s hard to make animal vocal chords try and speak, okay.]
LUP WHAT THE FUCK--
[It’s accompanied by what sounds like some thrashing, and then absolutely the sound of something in their room shattering to the floor. Lup somehow manages to ignore the chaos behind her completely, throwing up a skeletal peace sign before the connection cuts.]
[ooc: Taako is blue, Lup is red, both of them are purple! Specify if you want one or the other because the default is both with a three-way thread!]
Helloooo, Hadriel!
[For those who remember Stepford, it might be very reminiscent of their tv show, Lup’s voice coming through loud and clear to make herself a little more recognizable.]
You’re on with the twins, and today, we have a suuuuper important thing we need you to settle.
Bee-tee-dubs, we wouldn’t even need to bother with this if my dear brother could get over himself.
[Taako gives her a look, before re-addressing the camera.] Anyway, so there’s like, transmutation magic, which is awesome and rad, and then there’s evocation, which just like, does elemental stuff or whatever, and is super lame. So if you were gonna pick one--
Yeah, no. [And Lup raises a hand to prove her point, summoning fire instantly to her skeletal palm.] Deffo cooler than anything that comes out of his specialization. Trust me, fam.
[Without even a response, a translucent, spectral hand appears behind Taako, and moving in tandem with his hand, floats into the frame and smacks Lup upside the head before disappearing.]
I can literally turn into anything I want, whenever I want. I can fly, my dude. I could be a shark.
Holy shit, Taako. Give up the shark thing. No one cares about sharks! I’m not trying to crush your game or anything, but pick a better animal.
It’s a fucking shark! What is there not to-- no, you know what, stand back, this is gonna be amazing. [He is, in fact, backing up to give himself some space with the intent to actually do it, tossing his pointy wizard hat to the side in preparation.]
And there he goes again. [Lup could not possibly sound less excited if she tried.]
Check. It. Out. [Taako winks towards the camera, hands on his hips, and then extends his arms, starting to emanate a strange sort of glow. But just before their audience can catch sight of what supremely awesome magic Taako is about to throw down, the camera shifts, pulled to a close up on Lup’s skeletal face. She tilts her head, as if smiling, effectively blocking Taako’s transformation from being seen.]
Y'know, I don’t think I’ve ever looked so good.
[Behind her, a loud and rather angry roar can be heard, that still kind of sounds a little like Taako. The voice that follows is much rougher than his normal tone, because it’s hard to make animal vocal chords try and speak, okay.]
LUP WHAT THE FUCK--
[It’s accompanied by what sounds like some thrashing, and then absolutely the sound of something in their room shattering to the floor. Lup somehow manages to ignore the chaos behind her completely, throwing up a skeletal peace sign before the connection cuts.]
[ooc: Taako is blue, Lup is red, both of them are purple! Specify if you want one or the other because the default is both with a three-way thread!]
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[Taako cuts in to correct her, even if they don't... really look much like twins right now. He'll continue to insist on it.]
Polymorph doesn't really count as shapeshifting, anyway. I mean, like, I guess it is if you wanna get basic with it.
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[that's the only part she cares about atm.]
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What's there to explain? I'm a lich, natch.
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[somehow that's the least surprising part about all this.]
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[That's been like, a surprising point of contention around here about what that means.]
So if you're a dragon, how do you fit in here? Shouldn't we be able to like, look out the window and see you?
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I wouldn't be able to fit through doors, or hold utensils, or sit in chairs... you get the idea.
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What kind of sweet dragon powers do you have?
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I can fly! And breathe fire. My scales and claws are also really tough. What else are dragons supposed to do?
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--Also, not to throw around any unwanted crit or whatever, but as far as those dragon powers go. Kinda disappointed.
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Yeah, gotta agree with Lup on this one. We've got a friend who's like, dragon sized but still all scaley? And she can breathe fuckin' lightning. So uh, maybe you gotta get some cooler shit.
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What is this all of the sudden, a dragon competition? It isn't about the flashiness, it's about the utility. [she also has ice breath, she neglects to mention, but fire is generally more useful than ice.]
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Utility? More like snooze-tility. I mean, what's the point in doing anything if you aren't the flashiest one doing it?
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[At this point they're probably just being difficult to be difficult, if we're being entirely real.]
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Unfortunately, I don't exactly have time to spare for extravagances when I'm in a life or death situation. Like I said, practicality. [buzzkill.....]
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Lup, an awful person, raises a bony hand up to stage whisper to her brother, voice completely still loud enough for Nah to hear.]
Sounds like something a crappy fake dragon would say.
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He responds in turn, also holding his hand up but making literally no attempt to speak quieter.]
Yup. Like someone who doesn't wanna put in the effort to be a real dragon. Lame.
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Right, because a lack of theatrics definitely means I can't be a dragon. Forget about just setting things on fire, nooo! It's all pointless if I don't bother spitting fireballs at the sky in a pretty pattern, or if I don't shout a silly catchphrase before I freeze something!
["FIERY ICY DEATH STRIKE". that's not happening either.]
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I think my brother and I have just come to the unanimous decision that your dragoning needs some major workshopping. Lucky for you, we know our stuff and would be happy to provide you with a list of traits we think would suit you better. Though we'd deffo need some kinda compensation for our time.
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Agreed. It's really important to follow proper protocol when it comes to, uh, dragoning and shit? And you're waaaaay off. But we'd be super pleased to help you out with that for a totally nominal fee. We can negotiate.
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[she has nothing of value to offer!! except for her singular talent of setting things on fire.]
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Taako, she thinks we'd only settle for an unfair price. I'm hurt.
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What an insult, my dude. The price would totally be fair. Our advice is just expensive because that's how good it is.
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[how does she turn her phone off. which button does she press. help.]
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[the lich gives a bony, robed shrug]
(no subject)