hadriel | Royal Whining

[Kelson looks miserable, he's depressed and whiny on good days, and with Sorrow's resurrection everything he's tried to hold back is overflowing again. His eyes bright with tears, Kelson's struggling not to shed. His crown is lying somewhere, it’s certainly not on his head right now, his black hair undone from it’s normal braid.]

God help me why wasn’t I paying attention? If I was really in control and really a king I would have noticed. I should have been able to prevent it all. But I didn’t. Why hadn’t I been more careful with Llewell? I didn’t think he’d hurt his own sister. I didn’t notice until she gasped and by then he’d already killed her.

And then he had the audacity to glare at me before the executioner cut his head off. He looked at me with such hated. Why did he look at me like that? I wasn’t the one who killed her! He committed sacrilegious murder in front of hundreds of witnesses. I don’t think I can get married in that church again without seeing her blood everywhere.

I’m so tired of killing in order to bring peace. I want to be able to create life, not death. But all too often all I’ve got is death.

[Kelson shook his head, fighting to keep the tears from falling, twisting a woman’s wedding ring on his little finger, the ring once stained with blood, no longer fit to go on another’s finger. It wasn’t a good ring, but he couldn’t let go either.]

I had to killed her father. He wouldn’t surrender, so I shot him. Right there, on his horse. I just cut him down like a dog.

I killed his other son too. I didn’t even allow him to see a priest before he died. I just ordered my sergeant to haul him up on the nearby tree. God knows he deserved it. I know he did, I saw and felt first hand what he'd had done to innocent people. But I was supposed to be better. I took oaths to temper justice with mercy, but I didn’t feel like being merciful. He hadn’t been.

A friend came after me and asked me if I enjoyed it. He actually had to ask me.

[Kelson takes a shaky breath, unsure whether he can go on and keep going but this last one. This was one was most recent and close and painful.]

Do you know what’s worst of all? I knew my cousin was arrogant, I knew he was childish and jealous and I didn’t do anything. I thought he’d grow out of it. That maybe with a little experience he’d grow into a good man. Now he’s not going to grow up at all.

I’m sorry for the wasted life and all the hurt and pain. I’m sorry I had to behead my own damn cousin. I’m sorry he died weeping and it took the executioner 3 strikes to finish it. I’m sorry he left two children behind, that will never know their father. I’m sorry I’ll never be able to see the man I hoped he’d grow up to be.

[He catches his breath, taking a few minutes to try and collect himself, still wracked with guilt. He’s almost surprised anyone’s let him go on this long, and tries some humor, trying to force himself back into good spirits. It’s not working.]

To make it worse, I’ve been stuck here and haven’t gone to Mass in ages. Bishop Duncan is going to have me saying Pater Nosters until I’m fifty.

Does anyone have a sedative? I think I’d like to sleep unencumbered by dreams.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[A paranoid Kelson would be a very bad thing. Let's hope he doesn't. He took one of the joints to his lips and tried to do as she did, inhaling, holding, exhaling. It was kind of weird.]

[she takes another pull on her joint, too, and tries to relax. it's hard with years of bad behavior weighing on her mind]

Feeling a little better?

[Kelson was silent for a few moments, feeling things shift and change and relax, he could almost feel Morgan's hands on his shoulder, kneading out the knots.]

Yeah. I am.

[she smiles at him]

Good. I'm glad. That's what it's there for?

[Kelson looked at her confused.]

It's there to make people feel better?

[This was actually starting to remind him of the cavern with the vapors the Servants of Saint Camber locked him in. Maybe he shouldn't continue. If anything happened, he might not be able to defend himself. Kelson started getting a little worried. Maybe he should secure them both while he still could.]

Are you comfortable?

[she nods]

I think the plants were a gift from Tranquility. Probably the only non-asshole fake god left.

[oh no. it figures that he'd get paranoid when he got high. whoops? maybe there's still some way to salvage this]

I'm plenty comfortable, but if you wanna check the locks just to make sure, that's fine?

[Check the locks. That was almost funny. Actually, no that was really funny. If only she knew how little a detriment a lock was to him. And there were bound to be others like him.]

The locks aren't necessary.

[Besides, he could check them from here. Closing his eyes, he let his mind reach out to brush the lock at the door, making sure it was latched and tight before starting to build a protective circle around them, energy slowly coiling around, crimson at first, unless she breaks his concentration.]

[well, what else would he check? she's unused to actual magic being a thing outside of Lup's fire magic]

Then, what is?

[she gasps a little as she sees the crimson energy coiling around them, but figures that it's a bad idea to say anything about it or distract him. so she just sits in place and takes another hit off her joint]

[Kelson likewise wants to cast this ward while he still can, before his powers and concentration waver. Just in case. He can handle a little gasp, and he solidifies the energy and casts it upward, creating a a protective almost milky dome around them.]

That should act as a....deterrent.

[she murmurs "whoa" as the dome forms around them and shifts on the sofa, trying to get a better look at it from all angles]

A deterrent from what?

[Kelson opened his eyes]

Anything that might come in and try to harm us.

[Maybe he was a little paranoid. Then again he wasn't used to being in a strange place with no backup or protection. He slept under these things here.]

Oh. That's smart with that demon running around.

[Laura spent much of her life in strange places with strange people and no backup or protection]

[Kelson shook her head.] I don't know how much power she has. This may or may not deter her.

[If he could get those ward cubes from Curufin when they were ready, and figure out how to attune them, then they'd have something.]

This doesn't concern you?

[Kelson gestured to the shielded circle he had raised.]

Then let's hope for the "may."

[the elves Laura has met seem to be friendly enough, so he should be able to get them]

No. Why? Should it?

Abilities like this are not well tolerated among my kingdom. Gwynedd has a long and bloody history against Deryni--that's what we're called. Most humans aren't very comfortable with us, or what we can do.

Maybe. But you're not in Gwynedd. No offense, it's just the truth. And you're definitely not the only one with magic. So here, you're fine.

[she takes another hit off of her joint]

[That had honestly never occurred to him. He got a puzzled look on his face.]

You're serious. People here aren't afraid that I have magic?

[He knew it was far different in other kingdoms, but habit being what it was, it was hard to shake.]

I'm very serious. One of my best friends, Lup? She has magic. No one's scared of her and they won't be scared of you.

[understandable, but Hadriel is a completely magic-friendly zone]

[He wanted to believe her, he wanted to show her everything he could do, but he'd seen people back away in fear, he'd seen their eyes widen as they crossed themselves. ]

What kind of magic does she have?

[he can believe her. she'd love to see what he can do and she wouldn't be scared]

Fire magic. She can light up monsters like it's the Fourth of July.

[oh, she might be once she realized he could tell her to walk off a cliff. That was one of those abilities people tended not to like, even if he only used it benignly. It was the lack of control most people no doubt had a problem with.]

Fire magic.

[Kelson gave her an odd look]

Just fire?

[He wondered if he should meet this Lup. And compare. When he was a little more comfortable.]

[so? she trusts that he wouldn't do that to her]

No, she's got other stuff, too, but the fire is flashy.

[he should definitely meet Lup. she's fun to be around]

[That is a remarkable amount of trust you have in him Laura. Kelson would be touched.]

Fire does get the point across. I would love to meet this woman, if she's a friend of yours.

[he seems worth it from the conversations they've had]

Yeah? She's cool. Got a lot of personality and she's fun to be around.

Royal Whining

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