[video] You only THINK I guessed wrong!

[nonscriptum]

I fell victim to one of the classic blunders- do I seriously have to read this?

[You may recognize the guy on your screen as local parkour enthusiast and history nerd Nathan Drake. What he is wearing, however, differs so resolutely from his typical "jeans and a Henley" aesthetic that the broadcast appears to be hosted by a man whose sartorial sensibilities make him look like the quintessential Harvard professor: tweed vest, bow tie and all.

He gives a pleading expression to someone out of frame, who appears to have no mercy. Nate takes a fortifying breath and continues his recitation with approximately zero enthusiasm.]

...the most famous of which is "never get involved in a land war in Asia" - but only slightly less well-known is this: "never challenge an FBI psychologist to deliver a line with a straight face."

[He looks directly at the camera, then at the figure behind the camera, and mimes a finger slicing across his neck at the figure in question with a mouthed I'm going to kill you.]

Comments

[nonscriptum]

Is it, though?

[Nate's question is as crooked as the smile on his face, because now he's giving shit for the sake of giving shit.]

Kind of seems more like an incidental by-product.

[smoketendrils]

[YOU'RE STILL WEARING TWEED, MAN.]

Ah yes, but you see, I'm actually pulling this off.

[To be fair, very few people could pull this off. He's not wrong. It still doesn't make him look less like Steampunk Wyatt Earp Only More English.]

[nonscriptum]

[MAYBE SO...but at least he's taking it off when the day is over.]

Is that what the serfs told you? You know they only say that because they're contractually obligated.

[When in doubt make jokes about the feudal system at the expense of the upper class.]

[smoketendrils]

[In the most sardonic deadpan ever, because it wasn't enough that he's been sarcastic through this entire conversation. He just found a deeper level.] We don't do that in Whitestone.

[nonscriptum]

[Nate isn't an idiot. He can tell when he's pushing someone's buttons unnecessarily, he knows the signs of sarcastic discomfort, but it feels so nice to rib someone who dresses like a distant cousin of Napoleon Bonaparte that he can't quite muster the guilt.

He winks.]

I'll take your word for it.