☢ audio

[completelycrazy]

Hey, everybody. I'm Newt, if you're new here. Welcome aboard, I guess. I've been studying the monsters coming in through the Door every month. Hope sort of messed up my plans and all given that he eliminated, like, the entire monster population a few months back, but the bestiary's ready for it's public debut now. So, uh, here!

[He attaches a file.]

I nixed all the monsters that were in the caves and crap before I got here. Didn't see the point in including 'em since my research was, uh, limited. They're gone now, anyway. Some quote-unquote extinct monsters are still on the list, but only if I was able to really spend some time with them. I haven't gotten down to the coliseum to check out the new arrivals yet, but everything else that's currently in town is on the list.

[He's... pretty sure? It'd be tough to miss anything these days, what with the islands and all.]

Anyway, if anyone has biology experience—I'm talking, like, hands-on lab work, people—I do my research down at the lab. I'm also never gonna turn down a, uh, fresh or well-preserved monster specimen. Living is cool if it's something that's, y'know... Manageable. Can fit in a bedroom, or I guess a now-empty paddock outside that I used to keep the death worms in. Nothing too deadly, okay? Thanks.

Comments

[completelycrazy]

[Okay, actually, hold on.]

Do you not know how to read?

[demonsional]

I am trying to do it, but I am very bad at that thing.

[Super not smart.]

[completelycrazy]

Has anyone been teaching you?

[demonsional]

...yes!

[There have been offers and supposed lessons that I haven't threaded out in any official capacity so I'm chalking this up to:]

I think I am maybe not a good learner even though learning is a thing that makes me happy to do.

[completelycrazy]

[hh would have tried at least so this is fair.]

Oh, come on. I bet that's not true. You probably just haven't found the right learning style yet. We could try sometime if you're down.

[demonsional]

There are styles? Fashion styles?

[Oh my god!!!]

I am full of large excitement!

[completelycrazy]

...What? No, I mean, there's different ways to teach people stuff. I bet whoever's been teaching you just sucks at it.

[SHOTS FIRED.]

[demonsional]

[Stop roasting yourself.]

I love all of my teachers! When do we start! I can arrive at always!

[completelycrazy]

Uh, whenever, I guess? Just let me know when you've got some time.

[Which is apparently always, actually, and maybe leaving Hayden to decide is a bad idea... So...]

I've got some stuff to sort out with the bestiary project today, but what about in a couple days?

[demonsional]

Okay! That's perfect!

[It's all...perfect!]

How many days is in a couple?

[completelycrazy]

Like two? I'm in the process of getting a couple new, uh, friends.

[Monsters. He means monsters.]

I need some time to get the house set up so it's, y'know. [Safe.] So they can adjust. I'll call you when they're ready, and you can come over and help me think of names for 'em. How's that sound?