Abigail Hobbs (
am_i_a_monster) wrote in
hadriel2018-09-07 04:17 pm
Entry tags:
voice
[Abigail died in the deserted plot and has just been revived.]
Hello? Can anyone hear me? Is anyone out there? It's dark out. I can't see anyone. Please tell me I didn't go through all that just to be alone again.
[There's a moment of Abigail crying.]
I was dead. Am I still dead, is that what this is?
[Being alone feels like hell to her.]
Hello? Can anyone hear me? Is anyone out there? It's dark out. I can't see anyone. Please tell me I didn't go through all that just to be alone again.
[There's a moment of Abigail crying.]
I was dead. Am I still dead, is that what this is?
[Being alone feels like hell to her.]

video;
[ Will has been worried sick! He'd been here in the City but unable to reach her! He'd been stuck in a deserted version of this place, one without her and all he had done was worry!
Did she mention being dead again? This broke his heart. Will hadn't been there for her
againand something terrible had happened. As he rushed towards Hopes temple where he figured she'd be, Will left the video feed on. ]You're not alone, not any more and Abigail, I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you... I'm on my way, please don't cry, I'll be there soon.
[ Sure, he wasn't Hannibal, he wasn't the father she wanted but by God did he want to be... He wanted to protect her and take the pain for her, it was the least he could do. ]
Re: video;
Will? Are you okay? Is Winston okay? Is he inside? Don't rush. Other people are coming and it's stormy out. You have to be careful. I can't be alone again.
[She frowns as she watches him and wipes at her eyes, doing her best to put on a brave face so he won't take any risks.]
I'll try not to cry. I didn't mean to let you down. It's not your fault. You didn't make me be alone. It's safe here. I'm inside the temple.
video;
I'm fine, Winston is okay too, he's a little scared of the storm but he's hiding in the flat. I don't care if you're safe, I'm coming for you. I had no control over us being separated and I'm so sorry I didn't find you sooner.
[ A few gusts of wind made the audio part of the feed a little muffled and Will shielded his face with his other arm when the wind tried to pelt him and knock him over. Facing a storm to be with her was worth it, even if it did take the puff out of his lungs. ]
It might take a little while. I'm gonna look for a safer route to you. In the meantime, why not try thinking over something relaxing huh? Like, tell me what Hannibal used to make you for breakfast when you stayed with him? What music did he have playing? Did he give you anything to read?
[ A distraction technique might help keep her calm and mentioning Hannibal might also make her feel more at ease too. It was worth a shot. ]
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[She's glad for that, glad there was no body for him to see. No extra nightmare in his head. She gasps when the winds almost knock him down.]
You're safest in the apartment. I'm sure someone can bring me home. Hannibal made me all kinds of things. High life eggs. Did he ever make those for you? He'd do this trick where he'd toss an egg up in the air and catch it on the knife to crack it open. He made me sausages too. He usually played classical music. He taught me the harpsichord. He said I have lovely fingers. He promised he'd never cut them off.
[She stops for a moment, realizing how that might sound to anyone listening.]
And yeah, lots of books. Psychology books. He said I ha a knack for it. And books about all places we were going to see. I like to think that he can travel now, where ever he is.
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[ He'd died twice here, once at Hannibal's hands and once after having bitten off more than he can chew. It wasn't a nice thing, being resurrected, remembering what had happened to you and gasping, frightened, feeling for wounds that weren't there. He was heartbroken for Abigail and selfishly for himself, for not being able to do anything about it. ]
He eh, he made me eggs and sausage the first time he came over. It was delicious, I still remember it now. And he used to cook for me, fish I caught or a nice cut of
longpork...[ Will winces a little at the last thing she said, it might come off as strange to anyone listen, yeah... But, it was good to know Hannibal cherished her as much as he did. Just a shame he wasn't here now to look after them both. ]
You do! You're a very intelligent girl, Abigail. You're smart and strong and know so much about a lot of different things. Tell you what, when this storm is over, how about we go fishing again? Out on the actual sea instead of a lake?
[ A flash of lightning and a rumble of thunder have Will looking up at the sky as it opens up on him, lashing down on him with a heavy, cold rain. ]
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[She manages a little smile at the image of her two father figures sharing a meal.]
I'm sorry we didn't get to have more meals together. He wanted us to be a family. The three of us together. We would have been, if we weren't brought here.
No. If I was smart and strong, a lot of things might have been different. [The things she feels guilty about. She can't say them now.] Dying was going to take those things away. I don't know if it did. [She pauses for a moment.] Fishing would be good, yeah. There must be lots of interesting fish out there.
[She frowns.]
Will, you've got to go back to the apartment!
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[ She knows Will has his ways of finding out, ways that are painful and traumatic for him, things that leave him emotional and mentally scared- But if he has to, he'll use every ounce of his empathy on her to find out the real reason behind why she wanted to die.
Will smiled a little when she mentioned them being a family and the meals they could have had together. It had taken him some time, but Will was slowly coming around to what Hannibal was and understanding why he did what he did. There was still some raw feelings there too though, over what Hannibal did to Abigail, what he did to Will too! He still wore the scare on his stomach like a sad smile. ]
We'll have many more meals with him together as a family someday, Abigail. I know we will... He's been here before, we're still here, you never know what the door is going to pull in next... I remember being so distraught that I couldn't see you, didn't know how you were doing, where you were then you just showed up when I was at my lowest... He could return...
[ Will sounded as though he was trying to convince himself more than comfort her. As much as it caused inner turmoil... He actually missed Hannibal too. ]
No, no dying here means nothing! Life has no value here, Hope just brings us back. It's not punishment and there's no salvation, all we can do is live out best lives and learn to live with those here we'd normally fear or disagree with.
[ He's being a hypocrite, he knows but she's too precious to him, he can't stand to lose her. ]
I'm coming to you, end of. I'm not leaving you like this, not after... Not after what you've just been through.... Might take me a while though.
no subject
[She can almost see those girls, Nick Boyle, and more, as she talks to him.]
All I could think about was the people that are gone because of me, how I'm a monster. And I am a monster. Leo showed me that once before. It's like I told you on the plane. Some people are stained now. I'm stained. He showed me the stains, it was in me and it was red.
[She stops, not sure if it's even makes sense if Will's not seen the red glow. He still has a pure soul in her mind. Killing her father was done in her defense.]
I didn't want to be stained anymore. I used to tell myself that I could live with anything. But I can't when I'm alone.
[She nods.]
Yeah, he could come back. He can help me, help both of us figure out how to feel about all of it. He understands these things. And he'll give it all meaning. I'm not a monster to him.
[She looks down. It was all for nothing.]
I didn't know Hope would be back. The gods weren't around. I thought death would mean something,bring balance, destroy evil. Or that it would at least make it all go away.
[Like her father tried to do.]
Maybe what I went through had to happen. Maybe I'm not supposed to be alive. If my dad had just started with me, instead of those girls..
[She can't finish the sentence. She's heard it enough in her dreams. He should have killed her so he wouldn't have killed all those girls. So she wouldn't have gone on to gut people and shove them through windows. So Beverly wouldn't have died because she found her hiding spot.]
Just be careful, please.
[No more deaths because of her.]