hadriel | text

1. Do you wish that you had any freaking clue what was going on when you first showed up here?
2. Isn't it time we started sharing information?
3. Do you have an opinion that nobody cares about?

If you answered 'yes' to any of the above questions (except for the third one), then congratulations, you win the responsibility of assisting me! My name is Rhys and I want to start compiling info so we can start helping each other out and maybe give the new people something to do other than crap their pants when they're screamed at by jelly monsters.

I can program a startup message that can display a welcome guide or info or something the first time a phone is booted up. Hope said he can install it in all future phones too. But unfortunately, I'm one of the recent arrivals to this murdercave and I don't know a lot. That's where you guys come in!

So, give me info, like:

• What the hell is going on. In layman's terms.
• Where people can go to live or whatever.
• p̢̀́͡0͟f̸̵̢̕͟s͏̢ ͏̧̛o̶̸̴̡͞ ̴̕͝k̶͟҉ì͡L͡L̶̕͡͡ ̸̴̨̧͞t҉̧͟͞h̸͜$͜͏̡͜͡$̴̧́̕ ̵̕͘̕ì̕͟d̸҉͢͞0̛͡0̶̶͡͡0̵͢҉t̡̛̀͝͡ good scavenging stuff is.
• What we know about the, uh, supreme beings of this place.
• How to work the damn microwaves.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"idk"?

I'm not sure I would want to eat anything that's been cooked by magic.

Yeah, idk. Don't be a dick.

It's not... actual magic. I was being sarcastic. It uses electromagnetic radiation to... uh, vibrate water molecules really fast so they heat up the food. I think. It's been a long time since science class.

I don't understand what you mean by idk.

Interesting. [ he only got about half of that... ] Thank you for the explanation.

...oh. [This is going to be a learning curve.] It's shorthand for 'I don't know'. There's a lot of those in text. Chat lingo. You'll get used to it.

You did have chatrooms in your world, right? The internet?

No, we did not. What is an internet?

Oh lord save us, we've got a long way to go.

Between you and the creepy necromancer and the scary-strong guy from the 80s, I'm starting to think that I started a little too advanced with my post. We need like, basic technology lessons before we get to actual information exchange. Like, 'where is the power button' lessons.

You following me? You know where the power button is? Don't push it. You'll turn it off.

Would I be writing you now if I didn't know where the power button is?

[ he had to be shown that BUT STILL. the point stands. ]

I dunno, someone could have turned it on for you.

Okay, next step: phones. Do you know what a phone is?

Yes. That is what this device is called.

Okay. Phones were invented to make calls, to talk to people from far away. They were developed to all the functions these little suckers have, plus a few holographic projections, and were given the functionality of mini computers you can carry around in your pocket. Right now ours are the bare bones. I can change that, upgrade them, but first thing's first: helping the noobs get set up so they don't die horrifically on their first day in Murdercave.

There's some complicated mumbo jumbo with cellular signals and how phones are connected, but for sake of convenience, let's just say that it's all done here through Hope's magic, okay?

Your explanations could use some work, but I believe I get the general meaning behind your words.

My explanations are awesome.

All the phones are connected through what I guess is magic. The internet is a place on your phone where you can basically do anything you want. Kind of like writing a book or drawing pictures or whatever and then putting it out there for everyone with a phone to see.

When a boatload of people get together on the internet, they make shorthand lingo for longer words so they don't have to spend as much typing. That's chatspeak. idk is an example.

They also make memes which are like hilarious inside jokes for people on the internet. You know, like... with cats and really bad songs and stuff. That's about it on the internet primer I think.