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video; what's gonna be left of the world if you're not in it
[Sans has something in his hands. It's a bolt of fabric that he runs between his metacarpals with a distant, unfocused precision, something to idly turn between his phalanges as he speaks. Might take a moment to realize that the backdrop to his video ain't the typical one. It's not his room he's sitting in, after all. He's reclining atop a racecar bed. The sheets are perfectly made, as though the owner were planning on returning at some point. On the bedside table, there's a small stack of belongings that clash rather astutely with the layout of the place. A snowglobe, a binder, an ECHOcomm, and at the very far right of the frame, a folded-up sweater vest.
He dropped in to visit some pals of his, you see. Only to find they ain't around anymore.]
For those of you who knew 'em, seems the docs've gone home. You know the ones. Newt and Hermann. [A pause.] Dr. Gottlieb.
[Being a pain in the coccyx suddenly gets to be less funny when there ain't anybody to yell at you about it, huh?]
Hope it's home they went, and not, uh...wherever it was before they got here. Yao know what I'm talkin' about.
[He folds up the cloth in his hands and stands up, grinning at the camera without a lick of despair. Maybe there's somethin' a bit tired to the whole facade, but who can say? He's always tired.]
I hate to tell ya, but it looks like my bro might'a been the guy to slack off for once. Funny, right? Takin' that hard-earned title from yours truly. Here I thought I was supposed to be the guy who nips off without a word.
[Those with sharp eyes might pick up that the cloth ain't just any old thing. It's Papyrus's sash delineating him as an official member of the City Guard - twice torn, twice mended, and now without an owner. Like hell Sans is cut out to wear a thing like this.]
'Pologies to the Guard. Looks like you're one member short. 'Fraid I can't help ya there either; Papyrus, he's got some big shoes to fill.
[He winks at the lens before reaching for the communicator and then, almost as an afterthought, adds:]
Someone ought'a take care of the lab the docs built. Lotta their stuff's still in there, too, and lyin' around my place. Figure it should go to the people who knew 'em best.
[Y'know, whoever that is. But you all know who you are, don't ya?
Yeah. He'd think so.
He cuts the feed.]
He dropped in to visit some pals of his, you see. Only to find they ain't around anymore.]
For those of you who knew 'em, seems the docs've gone home. You know the ones. Newt and Hermann. [A pause.] Dr. Gottlieb.
[Being a pain in the coccyx suddenly gets to be less funny when there ain't anybody to yell at you about it, huh?]
Hope it's home they went, and not, uh...wherever it was before they got here. Yao know what I'm talkin' about.
[He folds up the cloth in his hands and stands up, grinning at the camera without a lick of despair. Maybe there's somethin' a bit tired to the whole facade, but who can say? He's always tired.]
I hate to tell ya, but it looks like my bro might'a been the guy to slack off for once. Funny, right? Takin' that hard-earned title from yours truly. Here I thought I was supposed to be the guy who nips off without a word.
[Those with sharp eyes might pick up that the cloth ain't just any old thing. It's Papyrus's sash delineating him as an official member of the City Guard - twice torn, twice mended, and now without an owner. Like hell Sans is cut out to wear a thing like this.]
'Pologies to the Guard. Looks like you're one member short. 'Fraid I can't help ya there either; Papyrus, he's got some big shoes to fill.
[He winks at the lens before reaching for the communicator and then, almost as an afterthought, adds:]
Someone ought'a take care of the lab the docs built. Lotta their stuff's still in there, too, and lyin' around my place. Figure it should go to the people who knew 'em best.
[Y'know, whoever that is. But you all know who you are, don't ya?
Yeah. He'd think so.
He cuts the feed.]
[action]
Snow problem. Some flurry-ous weather back home, but we don't gotta worry 'bout that here.
[He enters, but the jokes keep coming. He wouldn't have it any other way. Leans up against the wall with his hands buried in his pockets, the sash still caught between metacarpals, fingertips dragging at the cloth in an unintentional, repetitive motion.]
Who's there?
[action]
At the same time, however, Chara knows they can't regret it either. Once again Asriel saved their life.]
Woo!
[This was one of the dumber ones and they have to channel Frisk for it. But that part's easy.]
[action]
Woo who?
[action]
But a laugh is a laugh even if the punchline hits before the joke is done. And while they aren't going to say it to Sans's face, Chara is used to being laughed at. But those types of thoughts are not what either of them are here for. Chara's impression of Frisk and the way that they drop all emotion from their voice.]
Don't get too excited it's just a knock knock joke. I know you are fond of them Sans, but try to keep it on the down-low as to not disturb the neighbors.
[I mean really. A little consideration goes a long way.]
[action]
My mistake. Where're my manners?
[That one's the joke, see; he's got no manners to speak of, and no manner of keepin' track of 'em even if he did.
Silly jokes and one-liners and quips - they're all well and good. But he owes 'em more than that, don't he?]
Sorry to barge in. Guess I just, uh...last time I screwed somethin' up, I ended up here. Feels like somethin' I should do.
[Feels - safe.
Well, it feels like somethin' he should do.]
[action]
Yet here they both are. It's not perfect, but for an apathetic skeleton and a broken child...it works. * It ends with both of us.
They're also tempted to point out that both times were not Sans's fault. He couldn't have controlled the events of Confusions's resurrection no more than he could control who was and wasn't sent back home. Papyrus had mentioned to Chara that they all arrived on the Surface. It felt like something was clawing chunks out of their heart whenever Chara thought about it but at least he had something to go back to. Something happy for someone happy. But that loops back to apologizes and Chara would have to start making jokes about pencils and pointlessness. So no. Instead they just talk.]
Do not worry about it. I have always been the one with poor impulse control, so it's easy to understand. And it's not as if you took a shortcut without prior notice.
[Now that might have gotten ugly. But no one needs to know about that.]
[action]
If you want to do right by Chara, you'll finish what they started.
...
He don't believe it. Call it a personal failing of his, but he still don't buy it. Maybe they wouldn't hesitate, if they all got snapped back to the life and the world they lived before all this. Maybe they'd keep going, cleave through him, send the world spiraling to its termination like the reports stated.
Maybe they wouldn't hesitate.
He knows now without question that he would.]
Nah, I know. Just a bit much bein' in there right now.
[The place is gonna go to hell in a handbasket right quick, without anybody to clean up his and Alphys's collective messes. They'll never hear Papyrus's contented, no-indoor-voice GOOD MORNING! announcements or his good-natured grumbling at how long it takes for Sans to get up, and it'll settle over the house like a funerary shroud.
Not all that appropriate.
So instead he ends up on the doorstep of a kid who, god help him, has come to be somethin' of a friend. Despite everything he's done, everything they've done.
It's absurd.]
[action]
It did collapse. Chara's double was proof of that. Someone who found rock-bottom and dug even further. They had seen the Underground and the Surface go dark. And make no mistake, it was still there. It would always be there because that thing was another "Chara". The only difference was that one of them had torn the world down to the bones. They called and the demon didn't have to follow. It was already there.
But that's just another 'what if?'. There's still Chara's Hope, however. One day their shoulders won't exist for things to be placed on them.
That's then. Now...? Well...buttercups don't grow here, do they?]
I doubt people would fault you for taking a walk.
[Chara can imagine how that house might end up. They're neat by nature and thinking about it nearly makes them wince. But it may be in part because it also makes them think about Alphys.
This whole thing is absurd. People are absurd, the world is and so is time. But hey, at least there's knock knock jokes.]
[action]
Maybe more than a bit of shame in ending up turning to a kid in order to cope. A kid who's killed his brother, killed his best friend, who's actively researching the ways in which they can no longer exist.
Could he talk 'em down from that edge?
Who the hell knows. He can't even talk himself down, most days. It's just that giving up requires so little, in the grander context, and giving in requires effort on his part.]
I figure, yeah. Who'd question it?
[Still, though.
There are knock knock jokes.
Because he thinks of jokes, he thinks of Wade.]
I hear Wade took care of you guys. While I was, uh, out of it.
[action]
But there is that, yes. The line between giving up and giving in. They both had discussed it, back when the zombies appeared. The ease of giving up. And that is also freeing in its own way. You can just let go of everything and it requires so very little. The path of Genocide was much the same, like playing a video game with all the cheats turned on. SPARING Monsters was hard. Killing them was easy. It was just the matter two of them being difficult.
On the other hand there is giving in. When one hits rock bottom, it's expected of them to drag themselves out. That's what a good, responsible adult does. They don't wallow in self-pity. But it is not as easy as one might think. And...when you get sick of not being able to see the sky...
...ahaha. Well, they don't need to say it.]
Some people tend to stick their noses in the business of others in this cave. But yes, he did. I still need to thank him.
[Chara had been far too out of it to give Wade a proper thank-you for what he had done. They're still pretty out of it, their LOVE was not displaying properly. But regardless, at the end of the day that man stepped up to help two broken children rather than ignore their call. So that is the least they could do.]
[action]
[He's been a mess. He's gonna continue to be a mess for a while yet. Hermann and Newt's spontaneous disappearance from the cave so soon after Sans's death and subsequent resurrection - he'll take it hard. It'll be another weight on his back, the knowledge that people he cares about have departed and left him on his own.
Here Sans is spendin' all his time marinating in his guilt and regret and mourning, and he don't even have it as bad. What a selfish lot in life, huh?]
If anybody was gonna - 'm glad it was him.
[action]
Their help tended to be self-destructive.]
I can see why you like him, Sans. Bad jokes and a good heart rolled into one.
[A little bit of a call-back to the business with that shipping chart, although Chara's tone isn't as joking as it was back then. It probably wouldn't be for a long time. "Time heals all wounds" but the both of them know that saying is bullshit. It just ran long enough for scars to form.]
You are not alone in that house, are you?
[It's not an offer to come live here. There was something that Sans just didn't need to know about. But they do know that he shouldn't be alone either. You think too much if left to your own devices, after all.]
[action]
He's a good man. Don't deserve to be left alone.]
Nah. Me and Alph are still in.
[Though bringin' Alphys up carries its own unpleasant connotations. Bad time to get into it, he's guessing. Not like there's ever a good time but -
Maybe a worse time to bring it up than usual. Leave it to the wayside if he can. Don't just let things sneak up, like he had to have a reason to come here other than simply needing to get outta the damn house, and head to one the place he felt, paradoxically, ridiculously, safe.
He's got no right springin' this on 'em outta nowhere.
He lets it lie.]
[action]
Sans thought hating someone took work but it doesn't, as far as human beings are concerned. So it's nice to once in awhile meet someone who offered a sliver of kindness.]
That is good then. You two can keep each other distracted with anime or something.
[They don't say pranks and while they do think about Alphys, Chara doesn't say anything about it either. Let sleeping dogs lie for now. Chara had resolved to not regret their actions and their twisted form of justice. If they had to do it all over again they would.
But Chara is not above the consequences. When that time comes they will face the fallout and whatever else comes.
That's then. For now, it'll remain in the dirt.]
[action]
[Now ain't the time to get into it, nah. It's too much for that right now. Everything's - too much. He's got no energy for arguments, for discussions on ethics and the nature of consequences and personal justice. Can't even imagine hypotheticals, for now, worries about if it had been his brother, if he'd'a acted any different.
Don't matter much now, one way or another. Can't picture it all right.]
Asriel and Frisk been copin' all right?
[The and yourself? is all but implied, but the three of 'em all have that tendency to focus on the other two before they'll even so much as mention themself, if they do at all. Best to start with the external.]
[action]
[But both what Sans asks and doesn't ask is pretty clear. And it's a hard question to answer as well. All of them certainly were better now that the blood was wiped away and their wounds bandaged up. No more fear of death, of the sound of a building crashing down around their ears or the awful, awful words of all of their doubles and the truths they held.
By no means are they better, however. Unspoken actions and coping down the words of a man that did not exist to do right by everyone they ever loved. It's okay. We'll be good.]
I spoke with Asriel after he revived...however, I am not sure how he is coping. [Chara doesn't know if Sans knows what they do, but they won't say anything either way] As for Frisk I have been keeping an eye on them. Their wounds will heal in time.
[For what it's worth.]
[action]
God. God this is his problem with secrets, with promises, the whole ethos behind all of 'em, and it makes him a hypocrite but he's so beyond caring at this point, what he is, that it don't rightly matter.]
I think I scared him.
[That was...cruel. Even for him, that was cruel. Uncalled for. He wouldn't fault Chara for choosin' to take umbrage with that. Someone who hurts your brother, makes him cry - that'd be playing real dirty, huh?]
Don't think he remembers what it is his twin said.
[action]
And speaking of words...so Sans did speak to Asriel. His double as well, if Sans 'scared' him. Given what Asriel double had told Chara about the true nature of Flowey it was likely that the skeleton also knew.]
I hope he does not. You two spoke, I assume?
[action]
[Waitin' for someone else, no doubt. He doubts Asriel had much thought to spare to a Smiley Trashbag who judges kids as guilty unless they're proven innocent.]
I, uh...
[The flower. The king's kid. One and the same. And Alphys, she's the one who spiraled it all down to that. Through no fault or intent of her own, but still - still, 'cause of her, he lived like that. For god knows how long, through however many different iterations.
God. And he thought he was livin' in hell.]
Had no idea. It turns out.
[action] 1/3
When Chara walked away from Asriel's double and finally found time to sit down and think about the things Flowey had said and done. What Asriel had said and done.
He was the one who tried to kill Frisk when they first fell into the Underground. The one that stalked them throughout their journey and trapped them in a loop of death. He killed Frisk over and over until they managed to overcome that creature. And Chara can't help but remember the fact that Flowey possessed the power to Save and Load before Frisk came along. The things that someone without emotion could do, said they did. Saved everyone. Killed everyone. Read every book, burned every book.
A flower that, last Chara saw, was terrified of them. They terrified their Best Friend. They were going to kill their Best Friend.
Asriel. Beloved, kind Asriel. The one who had gone and saved a worthless human that had thrown away their life once it became clear what would happen if they stayed on the Surface. Who played Monsters and Humans with them, who loved them--
"You'd think everyone's learned by now, what happens to the people you claim to love."
Chara knows. And so...]
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Nor did I. I did know that he came here without his SOUL, but not that he and that flower were one in the same.
[Funny, isn't it? That Asriel's supposed "Best Friend" did not know that, hun?]
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He trusts he don't have to.
He and the flower. One and the same. There's almost no correlation there, so completely outta the ballpark of any theory Sans bounced around in his skull that, hell, no wonder he never pinned that one down.
Not so smart as the flower thought, then, huh?]
I'm sorry, kiddo.
[Quiet, distant. Not restrained, but - drained, the fatigue weighing deep and heavy in his bones. Not so surprised to find that right now, he kinda means it.]
You're supposed to - you keep 'em safe. You keep family safe. You keep your brother safe. And you can't - what d'you do when you can't?
[...who's he talkin' about again?]
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Sans speaks and they do understand what he's saying. Adults always protected their siblings and they would be expected to if their parents
Yes. Stop.
But a bitter, awful part of them wants to ask "What do you do if you're the reason your brother suffers? What if you're the poison rather than the cure?"
Asriel was the one that suffered the consequences of Chara's actions. Judgement came down on the wrong person. Now there was something the power of Determination would be useful for.
What do you do when you can't? Nothing. Chara doesn't say anything in response for a long while.]
I know Sans. If there was something I could do to change that I would.
[Even ask the Gods, if they could.]
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What do you do if you're the reason your brother suffers?
If Papyrus ever suffered, he...kept quiet about it. And some part of him, some ugly part, thinks that maybe he'd do that for Sans's sake. 'Cause he wouldn't wanna see his brother unhappy.
You never wanna see your brother unhappy. Much less twisted into something beyond recognition. And then when you're faced with the person you know without question is to blame -
Ha ha, wow. Let's not go there.]
I know.
[He ducks his skull by way of apology. Shouldn't've brought it up at all, but his whole life is a big long concatenation of shoulds and shouldn'ts, so hell - what's one more?]
'S not a feeling I'd wish on anybody.
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