magnus "the hammer" burnsides (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
armcollector) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
hadriel2017-05-14 09:23 pm
armcollector) wrote in hadriel2017-05-14 09:23 pm
Entry tags:
text
hail and well met good citizens of hadriel! i am magnus burnsides, and i am new to this whole. thing. this thing i am holding in my hands. sorry if i make any weird faux pas i was literally born yesterday. i am but a babe in this land of science fiction.
this is beside my point here but there are a LOT of weird things in these houses?? does anyone know what these machines are for?? i tried pressing some buttons but now the place just smells like bad eggs?
anyway the point is:
is there any way to get back something the door didnt bring with you? like a special weapon or beloved pet or dwarven cleric? does the door do delivery basically is what im asking here. can i order take out from the door. can i special order fries from the door.
i know i just have a ton of questions and nothing really useful to offer in return. tell you what, ill make you a sweet wooden duck or something as thanks. willing to be flexible on the shape of the wooden item. alternately if you got something made of wood and its broken i can take care of that for ya. help me and ill help you?
ok thanks love you see you!
this is beside my point here but there are a LOT of weird things in these houses?? does anyone know what these machines are for?? i tried pressing some buttons but now the place just smells like bad eggs?
anyway the point is:
is there any way to get back something the door didnt bring with you? like a special weapon or beloved pet or dwarven cleric? does the door do delivery basically is what im asking here. can i order take out from the door. can i special order fries from the door.
i know i just have a ton of questions and nothing really useful to offer in return. tell you what, ill make you a sweet wooden duck or something as thanks. willing to be flexible on the shape of the wooden item. alternately if you got something made of wood and its broken i can take care of that for ya. help me and ill help you?
ok thanks love you see you!
text
what did you mess with? the garbage disposal?
that's thing under the sink that makes really ugly noises if you press the button
text
i guess the name explains what it does??
but the thing i messed with was the big box with the door on it, but not the icebox. its got metal plates on the top of it. anyway it fucking stinks.
me and my friend are just trying to figure out all this weird shit but it's not going great. i definitely understand the magic icebox though. i wish i wasnt gonna kill the only scientist i know if i ever see him again because i could definitely lord some of this shit over his head.
a stone of farspeech you can type on???? what will they think of next!!!
no subject
unless you've burned something inside it. in which case, yeah, that's par the course.
[He's actually sorta charmed by this guy. It's been a while since he's had to give a rundown on mundy tech to freshly arrived Fables, which this guy certainly reminds him of.]
and try boxes that play moving pictures that string together intricate stories. and i've heard there are new ones out there where you can actually control the characters inside the box and make them do things.
that's what you have to look forward to.
no subject
maybe we just found its fart button.
[Magnus is pretty charming. It's the rustic hospitality.]
wait what the fuck???
i barely get what you're saying but you mean like
a box that tells stories except i can control the story?
that sounds hella sick. where's THAT?
no subject
they're called video games. you can buy a machine that plays them to have in your house, or you can go to a place called an arcade and stand in line with a dozen other sweaty people and play them that way
either way, you're going to be spending a shitload of money for the privilege
no subject
i left all my money in my clothes at the fantasy costco.
no subject
going out on a limb but i don't think you'll find any here
don't give me another sad cat face
it's better off this way
no subject
i really truly deserve to do my very own "video game".
after the past couple days ive had especially.
do you think they'll take a trade? i can make a mean chair.
no subject
you'd need to make about a dozen nice chairs to be able to afford one of those things
not worth it in my opinion
also
why would you want anything these assholes are offering
they kidnapped you and now they're trying to turn you into their emotional battery
why do you want to enable their shit?
no subject
but i diiiid just escape a place where some people were trying to fuel their powers with my suffering, sooooo
i mean, comparatively, this is way better. and all i had to do to get out of that was possess a wooden mannequin.
no subject
does that make you a carpenter or something?
because from the way you were going on about weapons and clerics, i thought you were some kind of warrior
granted, i don't know what kind of warrior makes wooden ducks. or eats fries.
no subject
i'm very multidimensional. and everyone likes fries.
no subject
what were you hoping to get back from the door anyway? the dwarf was pretty oddly specific, just so you know
no subject
he's our friend and third member of our trio but now here we are
dos lonely boys
out without a healer.
so i was thinking either him or my pet goldfish steven or my favorite axe.
i kinda came in dick out with nothing to lose. everything to gain.
no subject
[Maybe it's a sweetass fish, though. Or he doesn't get along with the guy as much as he does his other friend. Who can tell?]
well, out of all of that, the axe seems like it'd be the easiest to get back
or at least find a decent enough replacement for it
it wasn't blessed or anything like that, was it?
no subject
oops?
annnnd the axe was not really "blessed" per se but it was hella magical.
had the power to fell a tree in one swipe and also looked dope doing it.
i got another axe from the armory and i don't even know its name yet but it's no railsplitter.
no subject
[Because this is the second time he's brought it up so it can't be a fluke or some sort of deranged fever dream, this is the REAL DEAL.]
there seems to be enough magic users here to help out with that
maybe you could get one of them to enspell it?
no subject
[And Magnus is a little annoyed that he's apparently the only one this happened to. He's starting to feel singled out here.]
i've got a magic friend but his thing is more turning stuff into other stuff.
so i guess consider me on the market for a good magicking.
no subject
[Assuming it's not dead. It's probably dead.]
how many ducks would you price one of those at? just in case i decide to ask around for you
no subject
steven experiences a full range of emotion and maybe bringing him here to be spooked a bunch for godpower would be unethical treatment of animals.
[He's joking it off, but he's sincerely worried about his fish. He loves that thing, okay.]
hell, i'd make a fancy chair or something if someone enchanted an axe for me.
as long as they want it and it's made of wood i can make it for them.
no subject
a group of asswipes with god complexes feels like it'd be the next step up from a bunch of invisible monsters. logical progression, or something.
[Ehhh, throw the dude a bone, why not.]
i'll keep an eye out. i'm sure there's someone who would do it for less.
no subject
you're right. steven can hold his own. probably.
i don't really know the details on his powers but he is technically also a magic fish. like that should be noted. for the record.
[Magnus isn't even 100% sure Steven's not immortal.]
thanks dude! hey, uh, i'm always bad about forgetting to ask this, but what's your name anyway?