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[weedbgon]

okay gang time to get into a LITTLE philosophy with your pal professor merle. put your ass to the grass and talk this out. stay in school with me. don't be a loser!

now, hypothetically. in terms of this whole killer robots thing, since we can probably all agree they're assholes and they kinda make snags for us.

if you had a question you wanted to forward to one of the NORMAL killer robots who DOESN'T wanna be our friend, what's at the top of your list? assuming there's only time for like two questions before you get murdered, i mean. in the spirit of negotiation.

or heck, you know what? if you don't wanna think any up, save us all the trouble and just tell me what kinda VIBE you'd want a question to have. vibes are way easier. like cool teenager? hardboiled detective? big whiny baby? all that stuff.

Comments

[ctrlfu]

I would want to know why they are all so cranky.

Did someone steal their cookies? I know computers always have people taking their cookies. Maybe robots too. And that would make me pretty mad.

[weedbgon]

yeah see thats the kinda questions i want lined up! dig into their motivations! land a backstory! stuff we could fix!

all the robots ive ever met and i never had to ask em a bunch of stuff. starting from scratch takes work. gotta have some perspectives!

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[lovernotafighter]

1. what weapon are you weakest against?

2. where the fuck do i find that weapon?

do i win?

[ctrlfu]

Yeah, a lot of my friends are robots, so.

Did you ask them to run the tutorial? You should always do that.

/jacks

[ex_matricide319]

hey OP i agree with this dude. he wins

[lovernotafighter]

fuck yeah, it's unanimous! i'll take my badass weapon now.

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[epsilol]

i'd ask them who'd win in a fight between a caveman and an astronaut. if they're gonna murder my fucking face in why bother asking why

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[pocketspa]

so were you gonna like
tell us you were gonna rush off and do something stupid
or just wait till we found your corpse
im a party planner merle we had a whole event going

[weedbgon]

i got a buddy who rips their arms off. you know if they try to kill us.

so about how many of your friends actually ran a tutorial when you asked?? whats the tutorial even for?

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[weedbgon]

what blowing em up and stuff wasnt cool enough last time? nah. nope. i'm voting it down! that's a thing right?

last time i went in for this kind of thing the guy didn't tell me anything about how to kill the world ending terror until like a hundred years later

but i like the spirit! you know have a problem get rid of the problem. sometimes murder is just the solution! i dont make the rules

[weedbgon]

please, call me MH

i guess ill make a note of your vote

if youre not gonna come up with your own questions like a copycat

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[weedbgon]

that's the spirit! you gotta have a little fun with it sometimes! otherwise whats the point?

i think we all know astronauts win but if i remember and i get a chance i'll throw it out there

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[weedbgon]

oh shit
knew i forgot something
i mean its never too late to get that baby for the cake on order

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[epsilol]

seriously? a caveman would destroy an astronaut. do you enjoy being painfully wrong or something?

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[weedbgon]

yeah if i was an astronaut i'd be real scared of a hairy guy with a rock and a spear.

[ source: merle, who is technically kind of an astronaut. ]

actually i guess i would be kinda. but we're way up from cavemen! we got crossbows and spells! i got a warhammer!

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[epsilol]

if there weren't weapons or magic bullshit though it'd be a caveman wins scenario 100%

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[knifecollecting]

[It'll be easier to get her message across on camera.]

How about "Why don't all of you leave us alone?"

[circumitus]

well first of all itd be nice to know how anyone could even get the null on speed-dial for some reason that's supposedly so hypothetical.

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[lovernotafighter]

dude, even if it was a thing, it wouldn't make what i asked any less right. or awesome. give me some credit here.

[Well, shit. Sounds familiar. Not exactly world ending terror, but conspiracy theories and secrets. Tucker knew them way, way too well.]

let me guess: military secret bullshit? or just normal, everyday bullshit?

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[knockthemdead]

This hypothetical reeks of withheld information.

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[weedbgon]

have i ever withheld information from you, buddy

[ and like two seconds later: ]

oh wait maybe i actually did this time

[weedbgon]

a really cool looking combination of inner peace and magic

and probably a lot of uh

trying again

Video

[weedbgon]

[ Merle can respect that. ]

Y'know what, that is a pretty good one! I think so! Kind of a, uhh. A what's your deal, thing. Finding that motivation!

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[weedbgon]

oh well sure if you wanna be like that

if you take away all the weapons and magic bullshit its basically just two cavemen anyway

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[weedbgon]

assuming they agree to tell the truth and then do it. i dunno ill give you half credit. since it would be good to know.

normal everyday i guess. i mean i kinda did the mercenary thing for a couple years but it didn't work out long term. me and some good friends of mine went out for some scientific exploration and then got caught up in uhh

more serious than rigmarole or shenanigans. apocalypse stuff. but i try not to get all serious about it.