text;

[aroundthecoroner]

So, uh, anybody seen any gods lately?

[No, this isn't the start of a shitty comedy set, it's the start of a shitty network post. Michael doesn't make these often; this might be his third in more than a year. But this situation seems to warrant it, and if no one else is talking about it yet... well. Someone's got to.]

I don't think it's a coincidence that the power's out, the water doesn't work, and those monsters are coming into the city whenever they feel like it.
That and, um, I haven't been able to contact any of the gods?
They don't show up in the temples, either.
I'm probably the last person to notice this, but I think something's, uh, pretty wrong here?

[Anyone familiar with him will know that this isn't a result of speech-to-text; he really does just type that way.]

Or I could be completely wrong and just missing them.
So, um, discuss I guess.
What's our plan if they really are gone?

Comments

[aroundthecoroner]

You know that's, uh, a good point.
About the Fear thing.
I don't think this is an event, unless they're doing the same thing again.
But they just did that a few months ago.

[completelycrazy]

I dont think it is either but that doesn't rule it out as a possibility. The event where they vanished before didn't exactly present like the events we've come to know and love but hey it was still an event.
The memory swap thing came early this month so like why not another? Why not psych out the whole town to give Fear a big feast just in case we need to bolt again ASAP?
It's what I would do if I was one of them. They're not idiots. This was a good opportunity to make their fake-out seem real.

[aroundthecoroner]

I mean, yeah, that is a pretty solid plan.
But I don't know, they're not always great at those.
And wait, if you don't think this is an event, why argue for it?

[completelycrazy]

Just because I don't think it's LIKELY doesn't mean it's not a possibility worthy of consideration. Use your head Monroe. More of my genius shouldve rubbed off on you by now.

[aroundthecoroner]

Which part of the genius?
The part that can't spell my last name?

[completelycrazy]

Oh my GOD don't even talk to me about last names you couldn't spell mine without doublechecking if you tried.

[aroundthecoroner]

Geiszler.
It's not that hard.

[completelycrazy]

Yeah right you totally looked.
Anyway my point being I dont think this is anything to worry about just yet. We're handling it and that's all we can do for the time being.
The networks still up isn't it? Isn't that a god thing? They're fine or just messing with us.

[aroundthecoroner]

I didn't, actually, but you know, my name's in the phone.
You could just look it up if you need to.
I don't know how the network works, to be honest.
I thought it was a god thing, but all the other god things don't work.
Why would they leave that one if they were trying to screw with us?
They didn't leave it last time.

[completelycrazy]

And I will next time I find myself caring about how to spell your name. It was one letter dude chill out I got the basic concept right.
You see any cell towers around here? Wifi routers? The phones are a god thing trust me.
Anyway I don't know why but better question: Why would the phones still work if there are no gods around to power it?

[aroundthecoroner]

I don't know, I'll answer when I find myself caring about your questions.

[completelycrazy]

Uhhh it was your question first, dude. Youre the one that put up a post to the whole network asking about what our next move is gonna be.
Do you not want me to weigh in because you're all offended now?

[aroundthecoroner]

I don't want you to weigh in if you don't even think I'm important enough to remember.
Names are kind of a big deal.
Whatever.
We're going to end up in some chicken and egg situation if we keep trying to figure out how the network works.

[completelycrazy]

Wtf I remembered you? I misspelled your name by ONE letter. If we'd been talking instead of typing you wouldnt have even noticed.
I'm garbage at remembering names dude so the fact that I remembered yours without having to look it up is a miracle. Focus on that instead of getting hung up on one stupid letter.
Or consider that English vowels are weird and I will constantly mess them up so now you're discriminating against me because it's not my first language.

[aroundthecoroner]

Okay first of all it's Gaelic.
Second of all, you're fluent in English.
Just call me Michael if it's that hard to remember.

[completelycrazy]

Omfg you are dense sometimes dude I don't really care about the origins of the name I'm saying the vowels function like English vowels like there's hardly any difference between u and o in the case of your last name.
So what I'm fluent in English therefore I'm barred from spelling mistakes? It's a last name not a word.
Jeez why are you all up my ass about this?

[aroundthecoroner]

I'm the dense one, and you're the one asking me why I'm even upset.
Whatever.
I'll drop it.

[completelycrazy]

Hey what? No yeah sue me I dont get why you're choosing this hill to die on.
If youd like to fill me in I'm all ears pal. If not then bye I guess?

[aroundthecoroner]

Well for one thing, it's my name.
Feels pretty bad when someone you're around every day can't even remember it.
For two, just a tip, apologies are better than excuses.

[completelycrazy]

Oh my god its not like I see it written out every day and you don't come to the lab every day anyway it's like a few times a week. It's not like I even got your name wrong I just didn't spell it right!
I'm not making excuses! I'm stating my case!
But goddddd if you're gonna be THAT hung up on it then I'm sorry. I'm sorry I messed up one stupid letter in your name. There is that what you wanted?

[Newt is very good at apologies. It's on his resume.]

[aroundthecoroner]

Not exactly.
That gets like a 5/10. If even.
But I mean you tried, so I'll take it.

[completelycrazy]

[Holy shit Newt did not try, he doesn't deserve your forgiveness, Michael!!!]

JEEZ. Damn.
You win though I'm never gonna forget how to spell your name ever again. Not after this crap.
I can't believe you'll eat monster guts off the floor and yet your standards for spelling are in the stratosphere.

[aroundthecoroner]

[High standards for spelling, low standards for forgiveness.]

Well, good I guess?
And I do not eat off the floor.
Unless it's like, something that just fell.
Five second rule.

[completelycrazy]

Oh sure thats totally better.

[He would do the same, but his standards aren't on trial here.]

Jeez whatever I guess let me know if you get to the bottom of any of this missing god crap.

[aroundthecoroner]

Yeah, alright. Will do.