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[morphinum]

alright I got a few things to say here


listen I have been nothing but fucking pleasant and ""agreeable"" and whatever to you people here but I for one am not going to sit back and fucking take red lights in the goddam sky of a CAVE honestly what bullshit is this

actually no this is not the worst of the bullshit and frankly losers when you're comparing bullshit you're in a pretty fucked up place. the Bullshit Games. what an excellent ring to it sheer fucking poetry

honestly you wormfucks have a Serious Problem with your sky because why the hell was snow falling out from fucking rocks alright rocks are not clouds. get your shit together. I cannot believe I am the one telling you asswipes to get your shit together but HONESTLY the complacency of you people makes me fucking sick. I am practically vomiting you freaks should be ashamed of yourselves. not to mention the fact that the toasters here don't even WORK PROPERLY all I wanted was some toast. some fucking toast. is that too much to ask I don't even want butter ok just some goddamn toast. slightly burned around the edges and JUST SO YOU KNOW the toaster problem is not My Fault I am a culinary fucking genius when it comes to toast my toast has a fucking toast level gradient president snow himself demands my fucking toast I am no toast plebeian and I will not settle for this

I cannot BELIEVE you all think that gods are running this place what are you twelve?? is everyone here secretly a child because I tell you what you're all acting like scared little pissbabies and I for one pride myself on an anti pissbaby policy

I did not win two shitass gladiator matches to get stuck in a cave and I will blow the roof off this place if I have to don't think I won't

SINCERELY, FUCK YOU

<3 johanna

Comments

[dangerous_dog]

[Bob shakes his head; nope, nothing like that.

He does have a couple of knives though, of the varieties 'butter' and 'steak,' which be brings over to her to see if that might be of use.]

[morphinum]

[ She inspects the butter knife, and then the steak knife, holding it up to the toaster to see if one will do the job. The steak knife seems to be thinner, so she places the tip on the heads of one of the screws and begins twisting it off. The base falls off, revealing a jam in the toaster's popping mechanism. She smiles. ]

Ladies and gentlemen, this toaster is not a complete disappointment.

[ She says in her best TV-announcer voice. ]

[dangerous_dog]

[He coughs a half laugh, and settles down into one of the armchair-like things in the room, to watch her work, while he sets about the evening task- which is peeling the tuberous things that pass for potatoes.]