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Whats'a gurl gotta doo to get her mitts on sum crumpets around here? I mean, whoos I gotta blow up!? Imma doo it, I am if I gots to!

[ Tiny Tina has come to the network for one very important reason today. Her evil double twin kind of accidentally on purpose ate all of her food reserves. She did, however, leave a wonderful tin can castle, complete with moat and drawbridge from the empty cans for Tina to play with! But yea... Ate all her food. Not cool. Not cool at all. ]

Okay~ So like, Imma bee reeeel generous right 'bout now, SO LISTEN UP FOO! My sista from another mista, went and done me like Goldie Glocks went and dun dem poor ol' bears. SHE ATE ALL OF THE FOODZ! UGH! I got mutha Hubbard... I got mutah Hubbard so hard, right in the cupboard...

So~ Why is dis me bean generous I hear yoo cry~?! Simple! If yoo can make me some, oh I dunno~ Crumpets or choc-chip cookies, heck I'd even settle for a dank ass salad gurl! But yes! If sumone wants'a be so kind~ and doo me this flava, Imma make dem any kinda badass, bubblegum chewin', name takin', bra removin', super powah'd weapon of they dreams~

[ despite her tone and general butchering of language, Tina is being very, very serious. She has supplies, homemade explosives, homemade bullets and not to mention she still has some of that eridium from her homeworld of Pandora left. She's crazy and capable of anything at this point. ]

Dis is a once in a lyfe time opportunity yo. Yoo be cray cray to turn dis up. Mmm!

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[Now it's Yukari's turn to roll his eyes.]

Very well, then. I'll accept that as an answer. I'll message you the address.

[He starts setting up the supplies to bake the cake with as he talks.]

Try to behave yourself.

[ With that said, Tina turns the feed off in a hurry. She was already on her way over. With a scrap of paper tucked into the pocket of her apron and a rather disgusting burnt and charred finger she'd pulled off one of her zombie friends when they arrived, she intended to use it as a pencil, she'd been using the other four fingers for that very purpose already, why stop now?

Deciding to actually knock on his door, there she was a few hours late (she got sidetracked on the way over okay!) Bouncing from side to side, a little smirk on her face as she waits for him to answer the door. ]

Knock to the Knock-knock shawty!

[Since Tina had decided to make a rather late appearance, Yukari had wasted no time in getting started when the feed was disconnected. He had gathered the ingredients, put on an apron, and made sure to tidy up after himself as he went along. Tea cake took a little longer to make, but he took extra care to make sure he got it just right.

By the time he hears the knock on the door, he's down to the last tier of the cake, just setting it in the oven. And he'll find himself grateful that she hadn't shown up sooner when he sets the icing aside to go answer the door.

It takes everything he has not to make a cringed expression of disgust. He keeps his hand firmly on the door, to ensure she can't just walk herself in.]

I thought I told you to shower...

[He'll be damned if he lets this dirty mutt tread through his clean home, much less sit on anything. When was the last time she had a bath? It's probably for the better that there's not a backyard with a hose, or he might have gone and got it to hose her off with.]

[ Too late! Once the door was opened to her, Tina smiled wide and happily, waving at Yukari and giving a very loud welcome before ducking down and scrambling between his legs to get to the kitchen. Standing before the over, her little hands on the handle, just about to open it and get a better smell. ]

Oh, my GOD! Shawty! These smell sooo gud~! Is it ready to eat yet?!

[ Turning around to look back at Yukari, the pure joy and excitement in her eyes as she spoke. She was just a child, after all, her excitement was raw and pure. ]

[Oh, no, he's not having this.]

Out! Get back outside, right now! [He moves to go remove her forcibly, aiming to grab her wrist.] It'll be ready in twenty minutes. And then I will bring it outside to you. Now, out!

[Okay, so she's excited. He pauses for a minute. Then gives a groan, taking her to the kitchen table instead.]

You will sit here. If you so much as try to leave this seat, I will evict you from my house and you will have to wait outside. Do you understand?

[He's stern about this. Seriously. It's easy to clean the wooden surfaces.]

[Tina blinked as he yelled at her. Sure, she was used to loud people yelling all the time, but this was like an angry yell at her!? That was something she wasn't used to in the slightest. No one tells off Tiny Tina, what gives? ]

Ow ow ow ow owie~!

[ Whinging as he tugged on her wrist. wriggling and trying to break free of his grip. Staring up at him like a kicked puppy. If he had set her outside, she would have gotten board and pressed her face up against the window to watch. Her sticky dirty hands smearing up the glass in the process, he wouldn't have liked that.

Sitting on the seat with a sigh and a huff, swaying her legs and kicking the underneath of the table in an annoying drumming sound. ]

Has it been 20 mins yet? How about now? Are they ready? I can smell them! They must be done! has it been 20 mins yet~?

Edited 2017-02-26 22:57 (UTC)

[Thankfully, Yukari can handle noise far better than dirt. It's not pleasant by any stretch of the imagination, but he isn't visibly annoyed by it. He throws in the occasional, surprisingly calm not yet in response to Tina's neverending barrage of questions, mixing the chocolate chips into the cream cheese frosting while they wait.

When the cake layer is finally done, he takes it out of the oven for it to cool, and sets to icing the baser layers of the cake, stacking them on top of each other carefully. He takes careful implications to make the frosting have intricate patterns along it's detail. He doesn't care if it will probably get destroyed by the ~~monster~~ girl in a matter of moments, it's the principle of the thing.

When he's done, he finally takes his apron off and wraps it carefully for her, in the hopes that, at the very least, she'll be able to carry it home without losing any of it.]

Alright, it's finally done.

[He carries it out to her in a taller box.]

...Do me a favour and wait until you're outside of my house to eat it. [You know, just in case it wasn't obvious to the little mongrel.]

[ Tina's eye's lit up like fireworks when she saw the cake all done and frosting applied. She was too excited to kick up a fuss.

It didn't matter what Yukari was saying or why she wasn't allowed to eat any in the house, she was just happy to have one, and one specially made for her and her alone. She wanted to share it with him.

So, getting up and running at him, throwing her arms around him in a cheerful hug. ]

This is the BEST! Shawty yoo the BEST! ... Wanna have some of it with me now?

[ In that moment she actually managed to look innocent like the child she was. ]

[Oh, look, a double cringe factor. Not just for Tina not having showered and touching him, but Yukari is immensely offput by displays of affection from anyone but Curufin. (And even then... sometimes he'd rather slap the Elf for his crude methods of teasing.) Yukari's mind, and body, totally freezes up.

....It's not okay to hit a kid just for hugging you.

Yukari opts, instead, to gently pat her on the head in his state of shock. It's certainly polite of her to offer to share. At least she has some trace of manners. He actually manages a small smile.]

It's alright, you keep it all for yourself. A growing girl needs to eat. [Even if it's not the healthiest of foods.] Maybe the next time I make something for you, we can share.

[ Nodding frantically, letting go of Yukari and holding the cake as carefully as she could. She was treating it like any other explosive she'd taken care and time over. It was probably a big surprise for Yukari, to see her actually, kind of behaving herself.

Wobbling a little as she tried to look over the top of the cake so that she could talk to him. ]

So~ What kinda weapon yoo want me to rustle up for ya gurl?!

[It certainly does surprise him, for how much she was acting up earlier. But, at the moment, she's behaving, and the rest doesn't matter.]

Can you make anything that would work compatibly with a sword, as an add on or extension? Explosions are great, in this circumstance. So, perhaps an extension to a sword that could be used to create explosions, without harming the user of course. Would you be able to make anything like that?

[ Tina get's a slow growing, wide and crazy smile on her face. Oh ho ho, he just said the magic word. ]

Boo, yoo just' sit tight! I've got just the thang in mind!

[ Tina was quick when it came to thinking, especially when the thoughts involved explosions! She had an idea, something similar to Swordsplosion except this wouldn't fire explosive swords from a gun, it would fire projectiles with the swoop of a sword! ]

Delightful, I look forward to the results. Pleasure doing business with you.

[Yukari actually manages a rather sincere smile. Gains are a favourable thing.]

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