hadriel | video.

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video.

[ Dean's got his device set up so that this isn't all Blair Witch Project (thank god) but he's got a jar of his own, which he's... gently shaking around a couple of fireflies in. Not like Sid and his toys or anything here, considering they're still alive, but he's cheerfully giving them a rock and roll. ]

I don't get the bug thing, I really don't--

[ After which he sets the jar down with a slight clatter, where the fireflies can finally carry on flitting about. ]

I mean, this is like crack to kids, right? Catching these things, watching 'em fly around? Never understood the appeal. [ Says the man with fireflies in a jar but he's curious okay, don't judge. ]

And then with the warm and fuzzies... I mean- C'mon. Never known a God to offer that up without some kinda hand being played.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Merry ... uh ... firefly day? ]

Oh I don't know, there are centuries when I could vastly do without my sanctimonious brothers. I swear, if ever a group was created to suck the fun out of everything.

[ At least you can't see him flip a table. Not that he's actually flipping a table or anything. ]

so youre one of those angels.

[ The smirk he's wearing, however, is quite real.

If unappreciated. ]

Oh no. I fell out of that lot eons ago.

[ Dean's truly not sure he's capable of having this conversation by text because really, the number of layers to this is astonishing. And he might actually have to now get up and flip a table, let's see how Sammy feels about that. But no really, he has to try and think through this with some semblance of logic, becuase were this Lucifer, wouldn't he have made himself known already? It's not as if Dean didn't show his face, said his piece - he had every opportunity to make a move.

And yet.. here he is, playing at the whole thing as if they've never met before. And that's beyond weird. ]

and youre just mentioning this NOW?

[ Oh Dean, this rabbit hole is just beginning. Just ask Sam. ]

Well I don't usually lead with it as a conversation starter.

[ He needs to even try to process this first before he can ask Sam. That train hasn't even begun to leave the station. ]

maybe you should cause i think we have a small problem here

[ For the time being, it's going right over his head. ]

Well there are the fireflies, certainly.

[ Rude. ]

no i mean now, this. YOU. you're not

this is really fucking weird i hope you know that

Edited 2016-05-09 12:35 (UTC)

you're lucifer right? the grand poobah?

this isn't some fucked up practical joke?

[ As he watches the text spam come in, Lucifer begins to smile. Oh this was amusing! ]

'Grand poobah'? Oh I like that, haven't heard it before. I might keep that one.

But to answer your question, yes! And very astute of you!! Usually I have to make the introduction and then sit through the whole 'were your parents joking'? spiel. It gets a bit tiresome after the first 100 times.

The answer is yes, by the way, Lucifer Morningstar and you would be?

[ At least someone is entertained by his utter panic here. ]

dean winchester, you know, your biggest fan? [ Which is to say, why are you pretending you don't know him. ]

[ Well you have to admit, it was pretty entertaining. Were there any tables left to flip? ]

Dean Winchester ... Winchester ... I'm afraid it's not ringing a bell, and despite the volume I make it a point to always remember my delightful "fans".

[ Er yes, by 'fans' he means 'sexual partners'.]

[ Look he will find all the tables, don't you worry.

... and wow if he knew that's what he'd just implied, he'd be having a mild coronary. So let's just go ahead and make everything worse, yes? ]

you really dont remember? im almost offended

Look, perhaps you were the quiet one in the threesome? The screamers tend to make more of a lasting impression. Sorry.

[ Talking at cross purposes has never been more ... weird. ]

[ The internal screaming that just occurred could probably be heard across the land, but Dean's just gaping at his phone right now in some kind of abject horror becuase that sure isn't what he meant. And still- considering all that's been thrown at him since he's arrival, he's starting to question a few thing about his life.

... No he's not. That's a lie. Because if he fucked Lucifer in another universe he's pretty sure it'd be too horrific to forget. ]

COME AGAIN did you really just

try again.

the threesome i had with you involved you me and the colt. and you nowhere near my ass.

[ Just the mental imagery, dear lord. ]

[ Okay, now he's just completely amused. ]

I've had threesomes like that, foursomes as well. Mazikeen loves a little slap with her tickle and sometimes you're just in the mood for the bite of gunpowder.

Sure you weren't just a quiet one?

[ Dean might be starting to get the drift right around now that he much, much prefers this Lucier to... his own? Is there really more than one Lucifer? Is that actually what's going on right now because he's certifiably uncomfortable with it.

Even if he had to get stuck with one, he'd probably prefer this guy. Maybe. ]

im never the quiet one

[ Careful Dean, you might not want to make him intrigued by you. Too bad Chloe isn't around to warn you about the dangers of that. ]

Well now. That is promising indeed. Do tell me more?

[ For Lucifer's part, he's unaware of the idea of another whole creation, with another version of himself. He's gotten comfortable with the idea that Hadriel is outside Yahweh's sphere of influence and he does have experience with different dimensions. Just not the idea of multiple, parallel dimensions.

For the moment ... you're not bad looking Dean and of a good height to, well ... fill in the blank. ]

[ Oh c'mon, everyone is intrigued by Dean. It's a speciality of his - you either hate him or love him or are... fascinated by him? Okay, that's a little bit unlikely but it's a bad habit that he makes all the wrong people interested, at the very least. ]

what you want more details? favorite position, lights on or off?

[ Are you hitting on him. Is that a thing that's happening right now. Dean doesn't even know. But he sure as hell can't shut himself up, nooo... ]

[ Of course he's hitting on him.

Dean's cute, just the right height to ... well, let's not go there just yet and Lucifer is about as gender fluid as you could ask. Also watching Dean flail, albeit over text, is amusing as hell. ]

Oh the lights always stay on. I don't sleep with people if I won't enjoy watching them respond to what I do to them.

Edited 2016-05-16 20:56 (UTC)

[ QUIT IT!!!

He's already been questioning his own sexuality more than enough since his arrival, which was never something he wanted to begin with. Ever. Finding out he boned another dude in a different universe wasn't helpful at all and this is doing nothing for his already fragile sense of self.

This is just so terrible, so terrible. ]

thanks for that mental image, exactly what i was looking for

[ One day Dean will learn when to stop using sarcasm. Today is obviously not that day. ]

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text (1/4 i'm so sorry)

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text (done!)

text - omg Dean ... poor Dean

text - HE'S SO CONFLICTED don't judge

text - It's alright Dean, he leaves being 'judgy' to Dad

text - whereas dean is judgey to everyone

This is going so badly ...

SHH NO IT'S GOING PERFECT (1/3??)

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yes ok done

This doesn't deter him, just fyi

making it so much worse forever

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