hadriel | video.

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[ Dean's got his device set up so that this isn't all Blair Witch Project (thank god) but he's got a jar of his own, which he's... gently shaking around a couple of fireflies in. Not like Sid and his toys or anything here, considering they're still alive, but he's cheerfully giving them a rock and roll. ]

I don't get the bug thing, I really don't--

[ After which he sets the jar down with a slight clatter, where the fireflies can finally carry on flitting about. ]

I mean, this is like crack to kids, right? Catching these things, watching 'em fly around? Never understood the appeal. [ Says the man with fireflies in a jar but he's curious okay, don't judge. ]

And then with the warm and fuzzies... I mean- C'mon. Never known a God to offer that up without some kinda hand being played.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ We'll see what we can do. ]

hey! you wouldnt know for sure either way now would you

Think I'll have a fairly good idea when the other shoe drops.

ive got a handle on both shoes

That's what you lot usually think, just before you look down and realize both shoes have gone walkies on you.

[ ...... crowley is that you. ]

its that desperate need we have to be in control. makes us feel all. well. warm and happy inside.

[ Worse ... so worse. ]

Fairly certain that's the fireflies talking.

[ It's always worse. ]

nah thosere just the facts. us mortals kinda like thinking weve got a chance in hell.

[ The irony. ]

If you only realized. Mortals built the damn place, they just have a hard time accepting that responsibility. Not that Dad's too helpful in that regard.

[ GODDAMMIT. ]

angels. cant live with em. cant live without em.

[ Merry ... uh ... firefly day? ]

Oh I don't know, there are centuries when I could vastly do without my sanctimonious brothers. I swear, if ever a group was created to suck the fun out of everything.

[ At least you can't see him flip a table. Not that he's actually flipping a table or anything. ]

so youre one of those angels.

[ The smirk he's wearing, however, is quite real.

If unappreciated. ]

Oh no. I fell out of that lot eons ago.

[ Dean's truly not sure he's capable of having this conversation by text because really, the number of layers to this is astonishing. And he might actually have to now get up and flip a table, let's see how Sammy feels about that. But no really, he has to try and think through this with some semblance of logic, becuase were this Lucifer, wouldn't he have made himself known already? It's not as if Dean didn't show his face, said his piece - he had every opportunity to make a move.

And yet.. here he is, playing at the whole thing as if they've never met before. And that's beyond weird. ]

and youre just mentioning this NOW?

[ Oh Dean, this rabbit hole is just beginning. Just ask Sam. ]

Well I don't usually lead with it as a conversation starter.

[ He needs to even try to process this first before he can ask Sam. That train hasn't even begun to leave the station. ]

maybe you should cause i think we have a small problem here

[ For the time being, it's going right over his head. ]

Well there are the fireflies, certainly.

[ Rude. ]

no i mean now, this. YOU. you're not

this is really fucking weird i hope you know that

Edited 2016-05-09 12:35 (UTC)

you're lucifer right? the grand poobah?

this isn't some fucked up practical joke?

[ As he watches the text spam come in, Lucifer begins to smile. Oh this was amusing! ]

'Grand poobah'? Oh I like that, haven't heard it before. I might keep that one.

But to answer your question, yes! And very astute of you!! Usually I have to make the introduction and then sit through the whole 'were your parents joking'? spiel. It gets a bit tiresome after the first 100 times.

The answer is yes, by the way, Lucifer Morningstar and you would be?

[ At least someone is entertained by his utter panic here. ]

dean winchester, you know, your biggest fan? [ Which is to say, why are you pretending you don't know him. ]

[ Well you have to admit, it was pretty entertaining. Were there any tables left to flip? ]

Dean Winchester ... Winchester ... I'm afraid it's not ringing a bell, and despite the volume I make it a point to always remember my delightful "fans".

[ Er yes, by 'fans' he means 'sexual partners'.]

[ Look he will find all the tables, don't you worry.

... and wow if he knew that's what he'd just implied, he'd be having a mild coronary. So let's just go ahead and make everything worse, yes? ]

you really dont remember? im almost offended

Look, perhaps you were the quiet one in the threesome? The screamers tend to make more of a lasting impression. Sorry.

[ Talking at cross purposes has never been more ... weird. ]

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text (1/4 i'm so sorry)

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text - omg Dean ... poor Dean

text - HE'S SO CONFLICTED don't judge

text - It's alright Dean, he leaves being 'judgy' to Dad

text - whereas dean is judgey to everyone

This is going so badly ...