hadriel | two ; text

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two ; text

hey guys im here today to talk about a subject thats really important to all of us

safe sex

remember to always wrap it before you tap it

so has anyone found any condoms here because i have some buds who really need to get laid and im trying to look out for them

no glove no love my friends

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man i dont know what plants could take the place of plan b and id be afraid to experiment

condoms are way easier and more effective against stds or at least thats what the packaging says

[ Okay, see, now you've lost him again. ]

i still dont know what that is

and i dont know what stds are
unless thats what youre calling children, which seems pointless to me

hahaha oh man children pretty much are stds though

sexually transmitted diseases

you know like when you get all itchy or stuff burns or your dick falls off

not that id know ive just heard about it

thats a different issue

dally in brothels and street corners and thats the risk you take
its not a problem if you know your partner is clean

tell your friends to fill their sheets more wisely and they need have no fear for disease

sure or you could just wear a condom and call it good??

i mean im not banging hookers but im pretty sure better safe than sorry

you are the one who can find none of these condoms here

and i still dont know how its meant to keep you safe anyway

shiiiiiiiiiiit

ok so babies are made by tiny little dudes in your jizz and stds are spread the same way

so if you catch your jizz in a glove thing you prevent babies and disease

bam

my world lacks these gloves
obviously, this one does too

you are aware that not having sex is also an option?

sure man im not having any sex right now unfortunately

but my friends deserve to be able to get down if they wanna

so long as they have these sex gloves of yours
perhaps they could petition the gods i’m sure issues like this rate highly on their priorities

yeah thats a good idea the gods might help us out here

unless of course they prefer fertility
many gods do

well lets hope not cause unless theyre gonna give us diapers and babysitters and shit this place isnt ready for babies

on that we agree

in the meantime perhaps your friends could find lonelier ways to relieve themselves
there is always a choice to be made

no worries man im sure were all jerking off all the time over here

its more fun with a partner though

yes it is
provided you accept the consequences.

provided your friends do, i mean to say

hahaha i wish it were me

im gonna find some shit for em so they dont have to worry

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