✫ 001 [text, filtered away from Sans and Papyrus]

[sciencelizard]

hey there!!!!!!
so uh hypothetically if you were in a prank war with your roommates
and you were running out of ideas bc one of them already sabotaged the plumbing
how would you escalate that
without killing them and/or blowing up the house
hypothetically
yknow

[It's not even remotely hypothetical. The last week or so in the skeleton-and-lizard household have been ridiculous.]

oh and uhm
for ppl whove asked the gods for stuff before
how do you go about spreading hope lmao
i was thinking of a mew mew marathon maybe but its all on my laptop
which im... trying to get the charger for so uh
maybe talk to me about your favorite tv shows?? or something??????????
thnx =^w^=

Comments

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[somuchlove]

[Right now, while they're avoiding talking about anything related to their death, Chara spots this post. Filtered away from Sans and Papyrus, you say?]

Besides blowing up the house or killing them, is there anything else off limits?

[sciencelizard]

uhhhhh
no physical harm at ALL really
unless it's like... funny stuff like pelting them with water
but ive also already done that
a lot
otherwise uh... i think it can be anything

[somuchlove]

Here are some.

Replace a door wall protector with an air horn.

Duct tape their possessions to the ceiling. Or themselves.

Move everything one inch to the right or left.

Blow up a balloon, cover it with icing and serve as a cake.

[sciencelizard]

omg
this
this is devious
sans already put an airhorn under my chair but like
papyrus would go crazy for moving stuff

chara these are such good ideas omg

[circumitus]

[ohgod]

this is because of the hot sauce isnt it?

[sciencelizard]

yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
did he brag about it omg
im going to prank him harder

[circumitus]

not exactly.
just might have given him the idea.
maybe.

[Sorry?]

[sciencelizard]

[Oh. God. Sans didn't even start it. She kinda feels bad. But, also... Sans would've done it anyway.]

welp
i probs shouldve known he wouldnt have sabotaged his own ketchup
but he does stuff like this anyway???
and
he didnt exactly apologize
so i think he still deserves it

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[avephoenix]

Mess with their clocks!

Hide their bedsheets!

...what happened to the plumbing?

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[sciencelizard]

i dont think sans would care if his bed has sheets or not
but the clocks is a good idea!!!
papyrus would go crazy lol

oh and paps put a bunch of ketchup in it
everything ran red. for like. days
i had to go to an empty apartment to shower

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[avephoenix]

Glad I could help!

Oh that sounds terribly messy. Did you make him clean it up?

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[sciencelizard]

it kind of fixed itself
eventually it ran out of the system
but it was still. very annoying in the meantime
and like he sabotaged himself
bc he had to leave to do that stuff too!!!!
hes ruthless

not here

[skelebro]

[* Sans will remember this.]

also not here

[somuchlove]

[Well you know what they say about KARMA, Sans.

Get dunked on buddy =)]

[sciencelizard]

[SHE'S NOT EVEN CLOSE TO SORRY]

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[darthvaderfanboy]

[Hmmm, without murdering them, she says?]

Do something horrible to their clothes. Shrink them or make them otherwise unwearable. No one wants to wander around naked. Or do something to the food. Make something delicious that tastes terrible and leave it where you know they'll find it.

[He's been dealing with Hux now for weeks. The ideas have been multiplying fast.]

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[sciencelizard]

i encased sans' slippers in jell-o near the beginning
and there was the ketchup canon a few days back
but i bet i could get papyrus with gross cookies or something
sans might be harder
he doesnt tend to care when u do normal stuff 2 him

[darthvaderfanboy]

Ketchup cannon you say? How did that work?

[And can he borrow it?]

[sciencelizard]

[Yes. Yes he can.]

oh! its rly easy
you take a half-full bottle of ketchup and shake it to the top
and then add a spoonful of baking soda and close it
ketchup has vinegar in it so itll start to pressurize
so when they shake it before they use it
itll trigger the chemical reaction and shoot out like crazy fast and splatter everywhere
it was amazing

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[alltozero]

[Oh. It's... it's her.


Well. She's... having fun, right? She looks happy. She wants to get a new thing for animes. So... he should let her stay happy. She's sorry about her mistakes, after all, right?

(Not quite. Sorry about the amalgamates maybe, eventually. But not sorry about the talking flower.)

Asriel Dreemurr is a good kid. A nice boy. He would forgive. He should have forgiven already. He's got to be good.]

Hee hee! Sounds like you're having fun. I like your smiley faces. They have fangs like me. ^w^

I'm not bad at tricks, actually. Maybe I can help you?

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[sciencelizard]

[Ha. Oh jeez. It's him. Sans warned her he was here, but... look, she has no reason to be afraid of him. Just the king's kid! It's fine! Chara knows about the tapes, but she was forthcoming with those. It's nothing. So. So nothing.

She's silently really glad they're on text, because she wouldn't have been good with words in this moment.]

yeah!!! theyre cat faces =^w^=
so they have the whiskers
if you wanted you could do like
U^w^U
bc then ur ears are there
i showed that to asgore once he liked it

and uh
if you have any ideas id be all ears!!!
haha like the emoji
all ears
lol

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[alltozero]

U^w^U That's really cute!! I don't know what an emoji is but I guess that's what a ^w^ is?

[Kids these days and their incomprehensible slang, right? Ha ha. Asriel died years before emojis finally made it to the Underground! Flowey's the one with all the modern memes like trollfaces.

But it's better if he sticks to his U^w^U and not a =), without a doubt.]

I don't share all my good tricks with just anyone, but I guess I can share one. What you do is you take a camera and tell someone to smile, but what you don't tell them is that you're not actually taking a picture! Isn't that sneaky? They'll never see it coming.

[muscovy]

If they sabotaged the plumbing, you should make them a part of the plumbing so they can make up for what they broke. They won't die if you cement them into the wall where the broken plumbing is, as long as you let the head poke out.

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[sciencelizard]

[... WHAT.]

i dont uh
i dont think that would be very safe??????????
theyre monsters not humans so uh
were a little more
fragile
than that

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[muscovy]

[He honestly ...doesn't really understand what this person tried to tell him here. "were a little more fragile"? Who were?]

They are skeletons, so it would be safe for them. Though you could try to hollow out their bones to make them functional.