The city of Hadriel

Heya, cavebros!

[A little wave! Hadrielites new and old, you're treated to a tattooed, more-enthusiastic-than-she-should-be redhead. She looks somewhat casual today, apart from the shotgun resting innocently across her lap, and is seated on her apartment's couch as if they weren't all facing imminent zombie-related terrors.]

Ignore Hyperion just now. Obviously, someone's been hitting whatever gross bathtub stash he and his weirdo roommate keep stocked: he's not aware that we're in the middle of a friggin' zombie apocalypse.

[hoo. anyway. Lilith huffs, rolling her eyes, and cocks her shotgun.]

I have a couple things I wanna propose to you guys, since nobody's gonna beat my Ms. Pac-Man score. Ever. [Yes, that IS a challenge.] I'm in my spire and getting bored of window-sniping zombies, so is anybody down for a rousing game of... I'unno, tabletop? I remember the rules well enough that we can use the boards and dice I salvaged from the stupid board games that the gods dropped all over the place. Either that or we can have a zombie-shooting party on the roof! It'll be fine. We can light some of 'em up-- that'll be sweet, right?

[Suddenly, there's an ominous groaning and shuffling from the other side of the room: Lilith, swearing under her breath, fires her gun at something off-camera that crumples with a resounding thump. She makes a little sound of disgust before setting her gun back down.]

Ugh. I wanted to keep that one, too... Maybe wait to come over 'till I throw this guy out the window.

[The camera briefly pans to a now-truly-dead undead she'd....kept tied up????? in the???? corner???? lilith wtf.... before she cuts the feed.]

[As much as Lilith's got a distaste for Fear, she loves any excuse to put on a stellar performance. She's got a palm, shimmering with purple phase energy, facing up just barely in sight at the edge of the feed, to set the mood: the wicked grin on her face is cast in shadow.]

Okay, okay, I got one. Picture this. [Lilith clears her throat, and puts her best DM voice on:]

You're on Pandora-- you and your teammates are the only people you've seen for miles and miles on the barren, dry wastes. Except for the Psychos who tried to chew your leg off. Soooo... the only sane people, I guess.

You're starving. You're tired. Two of you are almost bled out, held up by painkillers and the most minor of healing injections, numbing all the nerves in your body that're telling you to turn back and to stop chasing this next kill. But, hell, if you've come this far, you're not going to stop, are you?

And. [Dramatic pause.] At last, you find it. The Mothrakk. It's the mother of all the Rakks you've ever seen on Pandora: a span of torn-up skin wings bigger than you ever thought possible, scabbed-up flesh over its terrifying bony frame! How the hell is it flying, you ask? You don't have time to contemplate that shit, it's spitting fireballs at you, raining hellfire down from the fucking skies!

Whoops. [She's knocked the camera over while gesticulating mid-story. (You do have time to contemplate, apparently.) Lilith clears her throat and resets the camera before picking the tale right back up again.]

Over an hour of fierce battle, third degree burns, burnt-out rocket launchers, and exploded rover turrets later, the beast is dead. You've all won. The horrible creature comes down like a meteor, and it shakes the earth where it falls... a mile away.

[Lilith's phase energy blinks out.]

You walk all the way there, and it's only dropped a white-level gun.

[Is she gonna go th-- yep. She is.] A Tediore.

Dun-duh-duuuuuuun.

Hey, gang! Hope some of you didn't get maimed-slash-dismembered over the last couple weeks. [stated as breezily as ever, way to go lilith.]

Got a PSA for you all. I know alcohol sounds pretty great, especially after the wendigo crap, but don't drink the stuff in the restaurants without checking it first. I got lucky with the first one I tried-- sorta tasted like a fruit cocktail kind of thing-- but one time a bottle got knocked out of my hands and it dissolved through the floor. So, uh. Yeah.

Also, does anybody else have guns around here? Are you restocking your ammo at all or are you just... rationing it out? I've been trying to look around the armory but every weapon there's of the stabby variety. That's great and all, but you can't shoot swords out of a shotgun.

[... no one tell her.]

That's it for now. Lilith, out.